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1003 - Merlin's Shop of Mystical Wonders



Viewers_big 4 people watching this episode right now.
249 laughs

Comments (77) Best Riffs (192)

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Abigail Adams - about 1 month ago

LOL Japanimation. My brother was constantly watching Voltron.


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mojojojo - about 1 month ago

every time Mike or Tom do the ~Midwesterner~ accent, I lose it. Early on with "Try the Merlin Chop. Half a pound of Merlin, veg-a-tubble of the day, and WHHHipped dessert." So bland, so nasally, so like home!!!!


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Linnaeis "I AM the button" Blake - about 1 month ago

EEVILLL!!


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Linnaeis "I AM the button" Blake - about 1 month ago

"Do you know who I am?"
I'm the guy who's gonna burn your house down. WITH THE LEMONS.


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Linnaeis "I AM the button" Blake - about 1 month ago

that shop cannot be up to code.


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Snuffy Wuffykiss - 3 months ago

The D&D nerd in me wants to like this movie. It has a similar set up to the Princess Bride and the first story had similar puppetry and special effects as Labyrinth, both of which i love. But mainly I just feel kinda insulted and let down. Makes for some really good riffing though!


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Matthew Boyle - 5 months ago

oh thats right moses cursed me? When was dead plants a plague of egypt? pestilence was one but that was more livestock right? And they weren't curses they were divinely ordained plagues. Curse implies black magic and witchcraft. the wrath of an angry god is much more benevolent.


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Matthew Boyle - 5 months ago

That guy is way to excited when he finds out his mother is calling. Although the almost immediate "no, everything's fine" is accurate.


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Matthew Boyle - 5 months ago

crow has a nephew? That means he has a brother or sister. Wonder where they are. Joel does make a joke in one episode about having something like over 100 people on the SOL even though we mostly only see 4 of them.


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Jordan Carpenter - 6 months ago

Okay, did seriously no one involved of the making of this movie ever try to sit the director down and explain, "Hey, um, if you want your title character to come off as a kind, wise hero, maybe you shouldn't put in an entire scene very strongly implying that all of his powers come straight from the devil?"


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FunkyBairdPot - 9 months ago

I can see Merlin quit shaving and haircuts since his days working for Santa. Probably still works for him too. Where else would he get that evil toy monkey. Santa's blood and human sacrifice rituals with Pitch to make that monkey. XD

Merlin and his creepy little monkey. At least his monkey works most of the time.


1:09:55
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Last of the Wild Ponies - 9 months ago

YES! A Mike + the Mechanics reference! In all my days, I never would've expected it, but IT HAPPENED! Thanks, MST3K crew!


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Last of the Wild Ponies - 9 months ago

This movie is EVIIIILLLLL!


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Last of the Wild Ponies - 9 months ago

I like Mike's Barney Rubble costume in the Zimbabwe experiment at the beginning.


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Ashlee Hill - 10 months ago

Rock n roll martian... Rock n roll martian!


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Mundane Marker - 10 months ago

The frame for this movie makes me think the writer intended this to be a TV series but couldn't get it approved.


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Great Scott - 12 months ago

The second story reminds me of Final Destination only with household pets instead of gore.


4 laughs

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Amethystia "Coco" Forrester - about 1 year ago

I can't help but wonder about the consequences of Jonathan as a baby. Like, how does she explain that when suddenly has a baby, is she going to get him a birth certificate... what does she put as the father? And she's straight up going to be accused of murdering Jonathan because he's gone and all of his stuff is still there so he obviously didn't take off on his own.


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Jonathan S. - about 1 year ago

I honestly thought the kid was saying f*cking robot Sh*t when he was first playing with the monkey.


3 laughs

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Ozzie Olin - over 1 year ago

The one thing that kills me the most about this is that the kid doesn't know the word "psychic", but knows the word "clairvoyant". What the hell is that about?


3 laughs

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TANKK 3000 - over 1 year ago

Really????? No riff after the "she is sensative in her area"....dropped the ball on that one guys lol


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Alex C. - over 1 year ago

1:13:16 - "What's in the bag?"
A SHARK or something?


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Rufus T. Firefly - over 1 year ago

If they ever decide to remake this movie I think they should just lean in to the whole "Merlin-as-an-old-hippie" thing and cast Jeff Bridges as Merlin.


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Amse Master - over 1 year ago

There is no way that evil monkey part was shot in the mid-90's, unless they were going for a super-accurate late-70's/early-80's look with that house, and the women's hairstyles, and the kid's Return of the Jedi shirt. It looks almost identical to the house where I grew up in the early 80's. Even the TV and the lighting fixtures are the same.


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The humanity - over 1 year ago

I wonder if this was J K Rowlings inspiration for the Harry Potter books? ;)


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There's something I hate so much about these 90s family movies. Something about the cutesy, "heartwarming hijinks"-type music and the stereotypical, overacted characters and storylines just makes me want to throw up. I usually try to avoid being this harsh, but it just drives me crazy. I don't like those things in any movie, but in these incredibly poorly executed ones (like this one and Quest of the Delta Knights) they bring me dangerously close to punching somebody.
(Sorry for ranting. I'm done now.)


29:13
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Austin Strong - over 1 year ago

"The verdict is in and the world was not awaiting a chubby, pompous eunuch!" Oh, I beg to differ, Crow. http://cdn.hbowatch.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/Varys.jpg


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Rock Harris - over 1 year ago

So, fire ants in the underwear can change the course of whole governments...?

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE can we do this now?!?


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Stephen A Nathe - over 1 year ago

this movie(and that definition is one of the loosest in the entirety of the series), screams 90s FAMILY CHANNEL/ABC Saturday movie


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Senor Misterioso - over 1 year ago

I can't believe it! not one single "spank the monkey" riff!


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tim trozzo - over 1 year ago

Mike has said that this is his favorite MST3K episode.


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Gabriel Traylor - over 1 year ago

This episode has one of my favorite bits - when Cooper is just babbling in his basement at one point - and no riff, (31:15 - 31:20) They're just chuckling at the character and Crow says, "What's his deal?" Just the fact that the character is so ridiculous that no joke is needed.


4 laughs

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I love that at about the ten minute mark, you can clearly see a member of the film crew - or possibly a prowler in Grandpa Bourgnine's house - casually turn around and walk out of the frame.


3 laughs

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David's psychic friend has got to be the second most irrationally angry character ever, after the grocer from The Brute Man.


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Stephen A Nathe - almost 2 years ago

one word....BROKEN!!!


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Amethystia "Coco" Forrester - almost 2 years ago

Mike's happy trail goes the wrong way


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It looks like Jonathan had the book set to 'M' for 'mini' when he should of had it set to 'W' for 'wumbo'!
(Borgnine did the voice for Mermaid Man on Spongebob. Yes, I am relatively young compared to the average MSTie.)


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Jen Bates - almost 2 years ago

It's nothing more than a rock!
Like your womb.


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(6:43 in) Oh my god! It's Senator Mitch McConnell!


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Phil Carstens - about 2 years ago

Mrs. Merlin is hot!


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Robert Brown - about 2 years ago

Interestingly, the guys do not note that Merlin will need a time machine to fetch his monkey because the woman bought it ten years before the thug stole it. Well, "thug."


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Dr. Despicable - about 2 years ago

Did Borgnine lose a bet or something?!


8 laughs

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Stephanie~ - about 2 years ago

The "You're Welcome" line never gets old for me.


3 laughs

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Arianne Wingard - about 2 years ago

This is actually, the first episode that I've seen of this show. As for the movie, As a whole, it's still nightmare fuel.


4 laughs

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Rufus T. Firefly - about 2 years ago

According to Wikipedia (so it must be true) the second story about the evil monkey toy was a re-editing of a horror movie from the '80s called "The Devil's Gift". In the original version, there is no Merlin or any other sort of deus ex machina that shows up at the end and saves everyone--nope, they all die horribly violent deaths. I'd like to know who the creep was that spotted that movie and thought, "Yes, that would be PERFECT for a family movie!"


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Packers! - about 2 years ago

Well, Rock and Roll martian I guess.


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Bruce Box-Liker - over 2 years ago

The true incompetence of this movie is that you've got the story of the grandfather telling a story to his grandson, which acts as a framework for a story about Merlin running a magic shop, which in turn acts as a framework for the other two stories.

It reminds me of a gag from the Simpsons, where Homer is daydreaming that he's asleep, and that his sleeping self in the daydream is in turn dreaming about eating a sandwich.


3 laughs

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Stereo Catz - over 2 years ago

Couldn't they just super-glue the monkey's arms together or something?


1 laugh

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Crypto Dentist - over 2 years ago

It's difficult to describe this movie without using profanity. Friggin' nightmare fuel for children, this.


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Mod-God - over 2 years ago

"Hmmm.. Which chin should I put my hand on?"


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Mike Carmona - over 2 years ago

Who would've guessed that Merlin's shop was the store in the Friday the 13th tv series!


1 laugh

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Bruce Ellsworth Reed - over 2 years ago

I admit, I love Ernest Borgnine! Everything, simply every part he ever played is always done correctly, superbly. McHale's Navy, Ice Station Zebra, The Dirty Dozen, The Poseidon Adventure are just a few.


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Classicats - over 2 years ago

The neighbor in the last story reminds me of Graham Chapman from Monty Python. And maybe a bit of Eric Clapton, too.


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Bees On Pie - over 2 years ago

You know, I never thought I'd find a man in a diaper sexy. Somehow Shirtless Mike has done it again and made me feel uncomfortable for lusting after something soul-gaggingly creepy.


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Cris Marko - over 2 years ago

So the wise old Merlin and his wife believe the burglar took the toy monkey and "traded it for food?" Further proof this is a kid's movie.


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Bruce Box-Liker - over 2 years ago

"I'd have given her half my cart for twenty bucks!"

So this guy's pulling down an absolute maximum of forty dollars every day, gross?


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Alyssa Transitoria - almost 3 years ago

Merlin's Mystical Shop of YUM!!!!


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Big McLargehuge - almost 3 years ago

Whoo hoo! I LOVE bags!


7 laughs

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Rachel Adams - almost 3 years ago

I love that the movie influences Crow and Servo to competitively review each other in the host segment. "My second trip to Tom Servo was even a GREATER disappointment!" Now who could I review...


2 laughs

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Matt Marino - almost 3 years ago

oh my gosh....the ridiculous music at 25:05-25:30. haha i love how Servo mocks it. this is a well riffed film but definitely one of the more depressing movies viewed. some of these 90s films throw me off, especially the latter half which seems more 70s


3 laughs

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Tuula Salonen - almost 3 years ago

n old hippy arrives in a puff of smoke, and no pot jokes? Well maybe it would have been TOO easy.


5 laughs

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Phil Carstens - about 3 years ago

I absolutely hate this movie. Let's go over what happens. They kill a cat, kill a dog, and then think it would be exciting to almost kill a kid. And they think it's all whimsical. I loathe this movie, and think anyone who worked on it should be locked away forever.

However, the riffing is great.


2 laughs

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LostHighway - about 3 years ago

George R.R. Martin cameo on the park bench at the end? :P


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Childe Harold - about 3 years ago

AAAAGGGHHH! WHAT IS THIS MOVIE???


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Stereo Catz - over 3 years ago

I forgot how good this episode was, minute 1:27 had me laughing so hard I almost choked.


2 laughs

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Gal Dagon - over 3 years ago

OK, so of all the people involved in the production of this POS, did nobody at any point stop and say "Wait a minute, this is completely messed up"?


2 laughs

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Gal Dagon - over 3 years ago

"Isn't it darling?"


9 laughs

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Gal Dagon - over 3 years ago

So all the women in that family think the monkey toy is cute. The kid has bigger problems than the movie had time to explore.


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Alex Silver - over 3 years ago

I can only imagine how many "Borgnine masturbates a lot" jokes would be in this episode if it aired today.


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wangson - over 3 years ago

oh man, tom and crow reviewing each other gave me belly laughs! "the verdict is in, no one wants a pompous, chubby eunich!"


6 laughs

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9 people watching this tonight...All in honor of Mr. Borgnine, I imagine.


4 laughs

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Benjamin Baxter - over 3 years ago

This is by far one of the best episodes, right up there with Time Chasers and Space Mutiny.


8 laughs

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Aethervox@mail.com - almost 4 years ago

The cartoon at about 1:02:43 is "Balloon Land" and I highly recommend watching it, because goddamn is it weird.

TERROR OF BALLOONY LAND!


6 laughs

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NS - almost 4 years ago

As you can guess from the comments below, this is a delightfully whimsical (and whimsically delightful) children's movie... if you hate children. The Screaming Skull had less death and supernatural mayhem than this.


2 laughs

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Alex Stefanic - almost 4 years ago

The whole monkey story is a blatant ripoff of a Stephen King short story from"Skeleton Crew".


5 laughs

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Frankie DeMario - about 4 years ago

The cymbal playing monkey haunts my dreams.


11 laughs

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Stephen - about 4 years ago

This one actually freaks me out.