201 - Rocketship X-M
|Short - none|
Riffs you quote here will appear randomly in the above.
You can't hurt an old campaigner like me... unless you bang my head against a steel grate.
You don't have to be crazy to work here, but help.
looks like Arizona to me
-You know, once I was on a tilt-a-whirl! -SHUT UP.
"When I was flying in the war -" -Awww! -SHUT UP! -Booo!
"A guy can get used to anything, I guess." Yeah, I once ate a woodchuck.
Call me 'Cobra'!
Alright, who made the Kool-Aid
Then you get up in space and...god your hair smells good
Oh, brother. He's dying and he's still giving speeches!
Look, you're getting on that rocket and that's all there is to it.
The Leaves of Grass exam is on Friday. And remember I will be in my office Tuesday but not Wednesday,
"That phase is at an end." -- I killed it and I'm glad.
"We're due in the assembly hall in two minutes." -- Assembly today? That means no class. Hooray.
Spinach quiche? Almost done.
I'm gonna go out and discover a new race and show 'em all. This is my side of the mountain. I'll show those guys. I'll live in a tree. Yeah, that's right. Use boomerangs. I'll show 'em.
Those straps get me every time.
This ain't rocket science.
Looks like poppycock. (BTW, those meteors didn't look realistic.)
Dead body in the trunk. Bag of quick lime.
At this point the rocket becomes engorged with astronauts.
Lloyd Bridges?? By this time my lungs were aching for air!
I see a girl that's sweet...gentle.
And when I get back on Earth I'm gonna call that girl, but in the meantime, love the one you're with.
Well, at least he hasn't been hit by a rock yet.
Down on my ranch I used throw a little ol' 1000 pound steer over my shoulder every morning.
Then I married her.
I've done some of my best work by moonlight.
Pah-HOOM !! **fist pump**
Uh Houston, we got a problem. Lloyd's makin' moves on the babe here.
Chauvinist detector just went off.
I've got about 800 head grazing down there.
That's a whole lotta head.
We carry Radar for navigation, shortwave for communication.
Eight tracks and cassettes in stereo.
Oh, just get on the rocket!
Astronauts, get to the rocket!
"Everybody return here after the takeoff."
Except for the astronauts. We need them on the rocket.
"Every news service and newspaper is represented here tonight."
All twelve newspapers in the world.
You are high.
You move his head, I'll do the voice.
They got rocks that big in Texas, Bill?
You don't have to be crazy to work here, but, help.
We might be in a vacuum, but, I felt the wind of that one. "Umm, no. That was me."
Sure hope Jimmy brought the Camaro in?
Do the words "dream come true" ring a bell?
It's a chillingly uninteresting assault of mind numbing, gut wrenching, brain bloating non action.
My hose goes right into my sternum!
The socks are all sticking to the sides!
I resent him.
At this point, the rocket becomes engorged with astronauts.
Well, cut me with a coat hanger!
Do you have enough fuel for a crash?
Timmy? Honey? Where'd ya put the extra fuel?
It's my grandma's skin...
Thank you, darli-... I mean, Larry...
So - not as good as us, is he...?
Reverse stock footage!
Now Linus is different...his hair is kinda' crazy!...you draw him like this.
Oh! Are you going to cry now..baby?!?
Quick! Somebody get her a sandwich!
Uhhh....what's my line????
and now I swing in to high and make my move!
If I held you any tighter, I'd be behind you.
Muffins are done...
Well, this should really test Floyd's sunny disposition.
Why? Is something going to happen? Should we get ready for the boring part now?
Don't get your hopes up too high
'Cause when all's said and done it's a Lloyd Bridges movie
If you're looking for something good
Then an hour from now, you're going to be weeping.
She's pretending to work so she doesn't have to talk to you.
They're coming up through the toilet...
1:00:28 And wipe that dopey grin off your face.
Quick he's waking up, tell that story again!
"Well, the good news is, we won't make a big explosion when we hit the earth!"
Oh, God. I need this job.
"You're immune?" No, I'm Lloyd, that's the moon.
"1...2..." (1...2...) "3...4..." (3...4...) "Clap on, clap off..The Clapper!"
It says Rand McNally across the top.
Dooooon't get your hopes up to high...cause in the end this is a Loyd Bridges mooooovie...
"For what, for momentarily being a woman?"
Psh, thank you Mr. White Male Reality.
Dear diary, well... we're all going to die and it's the men's fault. Our fiery demise is imminent, but at least I have my health... knock on wood.
*Crow's enthusiastic giggling at things floating around the ship*
*Tom's sarcastic laughter at things floating around the ship*
What's your dream?
Leering in from the back is the chief editor of White Male Perspective, Wilhelm Studman, visibly upset with the intrusion of a mere girl in a man's world. Studman keeps his distance because Chanel No. 5 gives him hives.
In a few minutes I'll be cutting these people open.
We scraped up the runway sir.
I just ate my own vomit.
Muffins are done!
I thought worm food was a bit strong, Lloyd.
Thanks for the rocks! Here's some bullets for you!
"How do we stand on fuel?"
I'm for it.
Stupid name by Ferde Grofe.
I have to make something clear-- I'm wearing a bra!
Open the window!
By this time my lungs...!
Good Night oven-clock.
"Have you ever done any flying?" Oh, yeah...
"The rest of the movie takes place in space; you can all go home now."
"'New York Times' --- spit your gum out."
Yep, leys go kill something' we don't understand
"Should we wake him?"
"Why? So he can experience his own fiery death?"
those are little miles ..... annnnnnd those are BIG miles
Oh man, either I'm high or there's about fifty Martian dudes down there! Oh man, game over! I gotta lay off the butane!
All it's been since we left is "Texas this and Texas that"! Well, I've been to Texas and it's not all that great!
He's waking up! Quick, tell that story again!
By this time, my lungs were aching for air!
Remember, you're an astronaut if you're wearing dungarees and have been training for the last two years.
Is that your support team? Three guys and a Woody?
"Well, she's a Texan too so..." That means she's rock-stupid.
The rest of the movie takes place in space, you can all go home now.
"I'm sorry that we haven't had any time...." Hey, we've got the rest of our lives together.
"I can tell u about 1000 wonderful hours we spent together, because I feel we would have---" it was all community service (~Tom)
"Must... add... fabric... softener."
"I've gotta' touch all of you. Duck duck duck goose."
"We baked a rocket earlier in a 450-degree oven..."
"Thank you for being gutless."
Sorry to have interrupted your production of The Lottery.
Thank you, but I already have one of those!
Cheese it! It's an entire race of mimes! We've gotta get back and warn Earth!
My grandfather went to Mars, and all I got was this crummy T-shirt!
They got salt shakers this big in Texas, country boy?
Hey, this Bart Simpson stuff is everywhere!
Hey, look, guys! There's the Statue Of Liberty... and there's James Franciscus, and Charlton Heston!
We thought it would be funny if we blackened the eyepiece on his binoculars... let's see what Walt Disney thinks...!
My chin looks great in here!
...not to mention it smells like a bus station in here!
You know, one time this happened to me -- I was in a convertible, and I...
She awakes with a hairball, and the worst breath of the day!
Those guys could at least stop shopping at the same store!
I did it, I'm Mister Airspeed...!
Boy, it'd take a rocket scientist to explain this...
Would it rust? Crumble? You'd have to put it up on blocks.
"By that time my lungs were aching for air" classic
"Prepare to jettison tail section."
" Valleri, vallera, valleri, vallera Ha ha ha ha ha !! "
(Valleri, vallera, Und schwenke meinen Hut. Das Wander schafft stets frische Lust, Erhält das Herz gesund)
CROW: " And we will be collecting BONUS COINS and MUSHROOMS !! "
" Thank you Darling, I mean Larry. "
Rhubarb, Rhubarb. ...Scientific Rhubarb.
Either this man is dead, or my watch has stopped.
Cut me up with a coat hanger, huh
I have some rather bad news - there's more film.
Oh man, if it's not one thing it's another. Who forgot to flush?
"Should we wake him?" - Why?! So he can experience his own fiery death?!
Yep, let's go kill something we don't understand...
"Will you do something for me please?" Shut up!
And enjoyable for all members of the family!--oh there'll be carnage.
Oh man... either I'm high or there's about 50 martian dudes down there!
You can't swing a dead cat without hitting one of his boring speeches!
You squirtin' glue in that mask?!?
Hey. they're shooting 2001 down there!
'how long has it been since..." - Hey, that's rather personal!
"We're not getting enough oxygen!" - My lungs are... Well, you know.
Oop, he's waking up, tell that story again.
Not tonight dear, I've got a headache.
Well, we stared at it, that oughta fix it.
Don't use Novacaine it dulls the senses...
"And then drive off laughing Maniacally?"
"Dad, stop! We lost the camper!"
"You are an astronought, what did you expect Dickweed?"
"Stock footage, away!"
"Hey, that guys not kidding! Nag, nag, nag."
"Now wrap it around her neck...."
Do you know what this means? "We're our own grandparents?"
"You're right. I'm not even thinking straight any more." I must be tired... I'm almost *interested* in what you're talking about.
"Stand by to turn." Like this? Or like that? Like that? Okay, okay.
At this point the rocket becomes engorged with astronauts...
Yup it's blinker light fluid alright, ..... you want I should check your muffler belt ?
No I'm Lloyd, that's the mew - oon.
Nobody is gonna strap me naked to a diving board, face down, in a pool of marsh - mellow creame.
"We're still drifting" off to sleep!
"Say, maybe somebody don't want us to get where we aim to get." Yeah, the god of grammar.
C'mon, look alive! You're getting scale, let's go!
There's a Mr. Oh My God My Hair Is On Fire on line 1, sir.
Ok, story so far. We got lost, flew to Phoneix, got attacked, we're gonna die.
their coming up through the toilet... Hey close the lid there is a lady present.
well that guy's trespassing right there
Hey! Who left his post?
Siegfried and Roy?.........Siegfried and Roy?
And, of course, "By this time, my lungs were aching for air."
And nobody's going to strap me to a diving board naked face down in a pool of marshmallow creme!
Come on, scatter, you guys. One bullet could get all of us.
get your shoes on honey, we're about to die
Does expedition start with an 'X' ?
I hope this new chin holds out.
They're coming up through the toilet.
Oh that is romantic; think I'll go slit my wrists.
And now the cast of "I Married Four Astronauts"