311 - It Conquered the World
|Short - Snow Thrills:|
Riffs you quote here will appear randomly in the above.
I love your comments. You look very sleepy when you talk. Now why is that Joel?
I'm your new boyfriend. ahllallalla
Where is she? "She's d-d-d-dusting." She's dead. "Oh."
Even in death her hair smells great.
Over my dead... *gun shot* oh.
Hey! No riders! ...oh, never mind. He's dead.
I don't know. The law's the law.
Come on! Shut up!
Hold it till we get to the monster.
Now SHE has the moustache!
Well, we're out of gas, honey. Now would be a good time to tell you about Biography on A&E.
We have to get smaller magazines!
Oh, great. It's a giant plastic pickle.
"Sorry, Tom. I can't believe you."
Then, give me back my cocktail.
"How are you going to do it?"
It's called the New World Order, Paul.
You know, I always wanted one of these - and I thought I'd have to get one packed in grease from an auction!
Is he Doctor Doolittle, all of a sudden?!
If this keeps up, we should get a turnstile...
Let's see, I'd like, uh, chocolate glazed, an' ya know those li'l sprinkles, maybe a large coffee, ya know, a coupla creullers. That would taste good right about now.
You WERE all bad guys, weren't you?
It's Carol Channing!
Mighty big chicken, isn't it, Corky?
I brought this can of nuts, in case we get hungry.
"I can see EVERYONE'S house from here!"
"Come on everybody we're gonna go skiing we gonna have a heck-of-alotta fun! doop da doop! We're gonna and die on the slopes and..."
Hey, come back here, Jerry, gimme my flaaaassk!!!
Title Puns...I love em'!
Oh..just get a pair of scissors and cut the string!
Hey, that drawer worked!
Don't start with me Martha! You laughed your ass off, George!
Wow,I really scored in there! The new stuff killed!
You mean in the car that works?!? Peter,wake up! No wonder you're hosting Biography!
How did she get outside?
She fell down. ...all the way.
"What are my next instructions?"
Put on a bra and sing Greensleeves.
In a few years these children will be addicted to painkillers, but right now little Timmy is paralyzed.
"How about a little fire Scarecrow?!?"......"Kingsford Cops...light quickly!"
I always knew I'd make a better Cowboy than my Brother!
Hi...Ummm...You were all bad guys, weren't you?
"You Filthy Murderer!" so another drink then?
Rock Lobster!!! down...down...down...
You want me to scratch my butt?
You will bow down before me!
Oh Great! it's a Giant Vlasic Pickle!
General Nuisance...Major Indifference...Colonel ??? Popcorn...
yeah! well you're full of skit!
Let's talk about shrinkage...shall we!
4th of July in Minnesota!
I did it for the Kicks...Man!
"Save mankind from what?" "From ourselves." Oh, now he's Ayn Rand.
Gertrude Stein on ice!
The world is coming to an end and Peter still looks pretty snappy.
"The cigarette works, Peter."
We don't approve of fast girls.
She's just going to slip into something a little more clinical.
Are you evil yet?
"She thinks I'm crazy." "Well, he does eat hairballs."
*Tom and Claire Anderson kiss*
Now she has the moustache.
"Listen, did you know that in the last 24 hours men have had their minds, their personalities, their moral standards imprisoned? The whole population has been herded like cattle into the desert? That men have been murdered for not obeying the new master?"
Yeah I hate the 700 Club too.
Honey, why can't you once let me take over the world?
One Adam 12. See the stupid monster.
I've done nothing... Since high school!
How about the word nag? Or ex-wife?
I can see everyone's house from here! Blargh!
You were all bad guys, weren't you?
Say--who's line is it anyway?
I understand now...Ronald Reagan will make a great president.
Venus calling... would you kids stop clowning around.
Yes it's prosrtitutes on ice...in a nice way.
Gunsmoke? No, it'll never work. Call my brother.
"Venus." You know. No arms, nice rack.
"It's a dangerous sport unless you know how to land upright." And this paluka now sells pencils on 3rd Avenue.
A flying bear claw!
No it's a pita pocket.
Can you get the Padres on that?
Wait, wait! It's prettier in Spanish!
She'll die first. She's useless and outdated and I'm gonna tell on her.
My wife's here. I gotta go.
Squealing on dirt? That's illegal!
"Well, there's blankets and canned goods in the closet. We'll make out." "Oh wowwwww."
"Remember your theory on contained gravitation?" "How could I forget it." Yeah, we were flying that night.
Honey would you get that crow out of the fridge? I'm gonna make them eat it now.
I'm sorry, we were washing and wiping...
It's the parade of shame and wasted lives!
I did it for the kicks, man. Snow thrills, everywhere.
I like to go a few miles away and secretly watch my wife.
"Try the lightswitch." Nah, the switch works, but the light doesn't.
Senator McCarthy is on his way.
You will bow down before me!
No, they're giving away the ending.
Inmates from death-row were subjected to horrible experiments!
You know, there's nothing quite as pretty on a sunlit day as arterial spray on the white snow.
I believe in peanut butter.
"Uh, Honey, I think we're growing apart. We don't have the same interests anymore. You wanna' conquer the world, and I wanna' put a shop in the basement."
"Oh, just get a pair of scissors and cut the string!"
"Well, I'm finally home, after a breathtaking tour of Cornwall."
"Ah, the night they raided Minsky's!"
"Oh, wait! I want that coupon!"
"Do not adjust your set. We can make it stupid."
"It's a safe and fun way to blow a Saturday! Or... a KNEE!"
"Let's talk about shrinkage, shall we?!"
"Daaaad, would you make her get off the ice?! Look at 'er!!"
Tom Servo - "New from Wham-O"
Meanwhile in a Samuel Fuller film not far away...
"It's the biggest one-man thrill..." I know a better one. Forget I said that.
--Ice skaters, young and old, die from flashing blades. --You know, where I come from, they arrest flashing blades.
It's Sigmund the sea monster!
Well, the world's coming to an end, and Peter still looks darn snappy!
I invented diet shampoo
It's a safety cone gone horribly wrong!!
The guy holds the fate of the world in his hands and he can't drive a stick!
It's the craw! ... Not the craw, THE CRAW!
(remember your "Get Smart" trivia, folks!)
"Oh, the ming vase!" "Ah, it was old anyway."
Come on, give Uncky a big kiss. mmmnnmnmn
"There's a mugger...run!"
Yes, it's never too early to fuse your spinal cord together. In a few years, these children will be addicted to pain killers. But for now, little Billy is paralyzed!
Grab the mail, would ya please?
Cross country shiing amid skenes of winter magnifichense in Sanada's shnow-sovered playgroundsh.
General Nuisance. Major Indifference. Colonel... Popcorn.
"Your hands are human but your mind is enemy." "And I won't bring up your feet."
Next on Biography; Me being terrorized by a giant, plastic, flying mitten.
She'll die first! She's useless and outdated and...I'm gonna tell on her.
You know, half way through the dinner my fillet got up and beat the hell out of my coffee, and my coffee was too weak to defend itself!
Joel: She must be Venus. Crow: Nah, too many arms.
Honey, honey, I met the general and I got this jeep and I saw a bat and... I got a job on Biography!
Venus, if you will, send me a girl, to thrill with all the charms of you, over
Oh....... you mean ah balloon ?
Just KILL it don't play with it.
Gunsmoke? It'll never work. Call my brother.
There goes another pop singer.
He's planting an electrode in her septum right now.
"One of the most popular sports in the winter is Shiing. ANd yes that's the correct pronunciation." "Oh yeah? Well you're full of skit."
Oh, we see some of the Polar Bear Club didn't make it out of the hole.
It's the 'agony of defeat' auditions!
"He learned, almost too late...that man was a feeling creature"
Bad Carrot! Baaad Bad!
So much for military intelligence. Oxymoron.
oooooOOoooOoo Is the great Peter Graves going to kill me?