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322 - Master Ninja I
Comments (25) Best Riffs (78)
Riffs you quote here will appear randomly in the 
above.
"Look, I'm getting on that plane, and... where I'm going I can't be with me... Or..."
"Oh, Cripes! It's those turtles! They moved next door! Now I'll never get any sleep!"
"You're traveling in it, Jack"
"You're jackin' in it, Trav"
(This almost cased me to drown in my tea! I'm surprised nobody posted it before me)
Max: "What else you got in that suitcase?"
Joel: "It's a Woozle named Peanut!"
Me: "HOLY CRAP a Jeff Dunham referance!"
"So, where's a good place to stay around here?"
-Shallow grave... train tracks are nice.
Everybody's gonna know he's a ninja if they keep playing that theme every time he comes in somewhere...
Man: I've been hearing about him down at the truck stop.
Joel: It's a ninja truck stop.
onscreen ninja thug: "You're a dancer, dance !"
Crow : "You're an actor, act !"
Now this is somewhat similar to the first episo... umm, I mean the first part of the movie.
"Your home?"
"You're traveling in it jack."
"You're jackin' in it trav."
"Oh, it's a ventriloquist pistol!" "Say hello to the people, Remmington!"
"We need a little more to bargain with." We'll send them "Pink Lady and Jeff".
"Meanwhile, the Master was getting us into more trouble." Snapping off car antennas in the parking lot.
"Anyway, I'm a cantankerous old man, who lived alon for a lot of years." And I'm going to learn the true meaning of Christmas.
"I guess you can't respect what you don't understand."
"I don't respect why this movie was made."
or
I would've paid good money to have David Carradine as Caine just stumble upon the set and beat McAllister to a pulp.
Tim Van Patten looks like Bob Saget lol
Yes, Demi Moore and went on to become a major star and Timothy Van Patten is now an award winning director, but they will always have this shame lurking in their pasts. Just as highly regarded two time Oscar nominated mainstream mega producer/actor Mark Wahlberg can never take back this….
http://youtu.be/-eSN8Cwit_s
I guess we all have our Funky Bunches to bear.
the tv car chase has NOTHING on Mitchell's hot merging action
Chinatown ninjas. You gotta love the 80's.
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Cool! Leon Russell reference @ 1:25:00
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wasn't there a series to this? i remember it from my childhood.
Four words;
"MASTER NINJA THEME SONG!"
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Lee Van Cleef's ninja outfit is so ridiculous. He's supposed to be invisible in all black so he can hide in the shadows or in the dark. Yet he wears this big shiny medallion just waiting for a ray of light to hit it and give away his position. Nice going, Lee.
I loved how Joel almost laughed when he read the line "Important and dangerous work" from the letter. I can imagine the crew of the battleship Missouri rolling with laughter as their letter was read to the thrilling beat of "Master Ninja Theme Song"!
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Demi Moore did this and STILL had a career?!?! Is there no god?
It's Claude Akins from those AAMCO commercials
This tv movie is like a combination of episodes of A-Team,T.J Hooker and Kung Fu
The old ninjas nose reminds me of the bad guys from prince of space.
That gang leader does alot of facial emotes for someone on the phone.
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I wonder if he has ever thrown his hamster instead a ninja star.
What kind of ninjas pose for sillouettes before they attack? Very stealthy.
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Hey, it's Brian Tochi - the Asian nerd from Revenge of the Nerds and Elvis Nogata from the Police Academy movies!
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Evidently, Tim Van Patten is a director these days. Here's a list of some programs with episodes directed by ol' "Max": Sex and the City, Rome, Boardwalk Empire, Deadwood, The Wire, and The Sopranos. THE SOPRANOS, people.
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It's baffling enough that a woman is fleeing a potential rapist by jumping into a stranger's windowless van without her taking a moment to assert command over the radio.
And when they put the line, "Don't do that; I like classical music" into the script, did it just not occur to them that they would have to score the first part of their high-tension car chase with a delightful and muted bit of symphony?
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I love during the invention exchange, when Dr. Forester is smothering Frank with a pillow. I couldn't stop laughing!
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LOL Crow's "basket" falls off at 34:37
This movie was released in 1991. Lee Van Cleef died 2 years earlier, December 1989. It had to be in his contract that they couldn't release it until after he died.
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He's an Occidental ninja master with a price on his head. He's a wisecracking young drifter with nothing to lose. They fight crime!
That's nice, but I'm not sure if I'm interested...
We also have this hawt young ingenue named Demi Moore. She only has a bit part in one episode, but we'll put her picture on the video cover higher and bigger than Lee Van Cleef's.
Better, but it's still missing something...
There's a hamster.
Does it talk?
No.
SOLD!
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Help! I have "Master Ninja Theme Song" stuck in my head!