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412 - Hercules and the Captive Women



Viewers_big 2 people watching this episode right now.
118 laughs

Comments (46) Best Riffs (183)

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"Help me, Zeus. I do not do this out of pride, as you know... But with humility." Er, yes. That's what Zeus and Hercules were known for.


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"I want to live! I want to live and laugh and love! I want to LIVE!!" Servo riff here (34:25), but nearly word for word what Frank said at the beginning of (I believe) Giant Leeches. Is it from anything else?


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Greg Legas - about 1 month ago

1:27:22 Most disciplined non-Riff EVER! Family show, family show....


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the music is weird.


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If I remember my mythology correctly, Uranus is the original godly being, father of the Titans, GRANDFATHER of the rest of the gods, Zeus, Posiedon, etc.


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oh jeez. the first host segment.... i lost it.


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Gratuitous Lurking - 3 months ago

Rock hits shield, guard falls down. What is this, a shooting gallery?


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Snuffy Wuffykiss - 5 months ago

Oh to live the life of Herc... Sleep, eat, drink some drugged wine, sleep more, make out with the local princess, sleep more...


2 laughs

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Ozzie Olin - 9 months ago

Does... Does Servo say "fuck" at 42:28?


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Teri Gee - 11 months ago

I noticed this time that the Queen Antinea and Hercules are actually speaking English while her daughter and Hylus are not.I guess this is what Italian cinema is like. They overdub all movies and so it doesn't matter what language is spoken by the actors. At least, that's what I've heard.


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Robert Brown - about 1 year ago

Zatharatoo!


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Robert Brown - about 1 year ago

So this is where the Wolf Raiders came from! An Atlantean genetic experiment. Or something. This may be the worst of the Herc movies on MST, which is a kind of accomplishment. Kudos to the film makers!


No Springs! (Or Pants, Or Restful Sleep...)
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I'm pretty sure that Coilly went back in TV-time to dub the little guy's voice. Also, I've gotta' say that Androcles looks fiiiiiine in his micro-mini dress and matching cape. Maybe that's why I thought that Hercules' visions of his missing sovereign/ex were almost affecting. (Or maybe the cheap feel and incomprehensibility of bad films automatically gives them the quality of a weird, half-remembered dream.)


8 laughs

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Teri Gee - over 1 year ago

I'll be honest, here: I think the Hercules/Maciste/Colossus movies are really easy to watch. They're not deep and meaningful, of course, but they're classic cheap adventure movies and I could easily watch them without riffing.

They're ripe for riffing, but they're not like the non-movies of the Coleman Francis type.


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They reference Firesign Theater at 19:15 it makes me happy


3 laughs

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MSTeacher3K - over 1 year ago

Why does this movie's title have "Captive WomEn" in it? There are only three scenes in which a womAn is being held captive, and those scenes are fairly short. A better title would have been "Hercules and the Albino Atlanteans", or "Hercules and the Wrath of Uranus".


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ColemanFrancis's Ghost - over 1 year ago

How about Gian Maria Volonte (from the Fistful of Dollars and a Few Dollars more) in his third role at around 13:00 (he's the guy who throws the spears at the wall)


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Andrew - over 1 year ago

Damn.... Another one blocked in the US... *shakes fist*


2 laughs

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Richard Deakin - over 1 year ago

Love it when Gypsy finally got involved in the riffing! Why is it that in all these Herc movies, they make Hercules always dum and lazy? I don't get it! He wasn't like that really in mythology was he? Love all the Uranus jokes too! Too many cheap Uranus jokes to mention, but real funny! Don't get what Atlantis and Uranus have in common though :-\ ....oh well.


3 laughs

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Teri Gee - almost 2 years ago

Okay, I just noticed. The music at the end of this movie is the same as The Thing That Couldn't Die. (That's the name, right? The one with Aunt Flavia? In season 8?). And I think it's the same as in Revenge of the Creature, too.


5 laughs

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Sean Barry - about 2 years ago

You know a movie is going to be bad when the main protagonist spends most of his time sleeping...


2 laughs

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Cris Marko - about 2 years ago

This is one of the films that riffs itself.


Hercules and the Captive Women
3 laughs

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Stu Slaymaker - about 2 years ago

"The blood of Uranus can never be destroyed!"


5 laughs

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Great Scott - about 2 years ago

Giant faux rocks, apply directly to the forehead.


5 laughs

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Great Scott - about 2 years ago

Wow, Joel's leg is really long... and flexible... and boneless.


5 laughs

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David - over 2 years ago

I gave this one my first good watching last night and I have to ask : where were the captive women? There were lots of captive men, a bunch of captive kids but only one captive woman who Herc saved thirty seconds after she showed up. This movie has the most inaccurate title since "Future War" !


3 laughs

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Bruce Ellsworth Reed - over 2 years ago

Proper pronunciations; [zar-uh-thoo-struh] and [you-rey-nus]! Not [urine-us], I so hate PC!


2 laughs

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Joshua Bowers - over 2 years ago

I know this was the 90s, and that there was no Interwebs to look stuff up on, and that the characters frequently mispronounce things, but "Zatharatu"? Seriously?


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Elisa Farrington - over 2 years ago

"Gee wow Dad, you're really strong Dad...can I help Dad? Hercules and son escaping from Antinea's dungeon is the golden fleece in this bomb. "...go set the table for your mother."


1 laugh

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Elisa Farrington - over 2 years ago

1:19:34 - Did anyone else take a double take at that view of the sea? I had to go back and pause to see if it was as bad as I thought...yep!


3 laughs

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Leslie Doesn't Get You - over 2 years ago

09:10 Joel looks over at Gypsy before she delivers her one good joke. I guess he was signalling Jim, but I wish he'd done it in some other way that we couldn't see.


4 laughs

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That is the second worst man vs. lizard fight I've ever seen.


2 laughs

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David Sircin - almost 3 years ago

This is a great episode with a lot of good riffs, but I think Crow's eulogy takes the cake for funniest line.


4 laughs

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Garry Tardy - almost 3 years ago

This was the first MST3K episode I ever saw so I have a soft spot for it. And personally, the Uranus jokes never get old. :)


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Leslie Doesn't Get You - almost 3 years ago

1:12:17. Look at the left two thirds of the screen. Doesn't it look like the mask the head of the Moon Men wore in Hercules Against the Moon Men? If you look at it with a little imagination.


7 laughs

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Fredrick Stafford - about 3 years ago

Whew, that was painful. If anyone has a large Styrofoam boulder please feel free to bounce it off my head.


2 laughs

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Super McWonderfull - about 3 years ago

A different person playing Hercules again.... oh well, movie was still good (for a b budget film).....another perfect film for Mystery Science Theater to BEEF up ! ! !


5 laughs

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Sabrina Domingues - about 3 years ago

There IS such a thing as good-natured brawling.


2 laughs

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Oh, great; here's another cheap-assed movie that's ripping off the Creature From The Black Lagoon music: Dah-dah DAAAHHH dah... DAH DAH DAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!


13 laughs

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Brad Gravett - over 3 years ago

Reg Park is the best Herc. At all times he has the look of a man just hit by a fish.


3 laughs

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Brad D - over 3 years ago

Another great Herc riff fest. The Uranus riffs alone are worth sitting through the whole thing.


3 laughs

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Leslie Doesn't Get You - over 3 years ago

57:03, that guy on the right, doesn't he look like Edgar Allan Poe?


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Matt Towler - over 3 years ago

Gahhh, so many Uranus jokes in this one...


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Gal Dagon - over 3 years ago

No Riffs could really top the Uranus dialogue approximately one hour into the show.


7 laughs

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Matthew Eickhoff - almost 4 years ago

This Hercules movie is hilarious, the first part is slow, but Gypsy in the theater makes up for that.


4 laughs

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NS - almost 4 years ago

My inner 6-year-old would have found this movie hilarious even without the riffing.

I'm certain I haven't watched this episode in the past decade, but specific parts of it are very familiar. Could this have been my first MST3K?