507 - I Accuse My Parents
|Short - The Truck Farmer:|
Riffs you quote here will appear randomly in the above.
We invited the cast of Gigi over!
Most farmers like to listen to Igor Stravinsky when they farm.
I was torn from the side of Zeus...
Son, it's been two months and you haven't touched your hamburger.
Hey Showbiz ... can we get our food over here!
I gotta control my urges !
I'm thinkin' of tellin' my wife I love her. Nahh, forget it, 's not worth it.
Crow at 16:35 (I'd quote it if I could spell all that.)
"Mom?" - I'm up here, honey, with the D.T.'s! Could you get the yellow lizard outta the bathroom?
I won the 'Get the Crap Kicked Outta Ya' contest!
(in closet) Hey, where'd you get these golf clubs?
"No? Well I'll make it clear--" T'knrrn-rnp'knrrn-ch!
Love came between us... ooh. Butter mints, huh?. Don't mind if I do. *nompf*
Mirror, mirror on the wall / Will I make it to last call?
Let me guess, it's your birthday.
The audience is, frankly, stunned.
Joel you magnificent bastard I read your menu!
Hey where'd you get these golf clubs?
She is putting on her tassels now.
Who knows what lurks in the hearts of men? The Shadow knows!
Sergeant, take the gun and shoot the corporal.
*BANG BANG BANG* Who's there?
♫They laughed when I accused my parents and I killed them, let's see if they'll be laughing noooowwww!♫
There's nothing we can't spray!
Joel, you magnificent bastard, I read your menu!
That guy's eavesdropping on his eavesdropping!
Wha's this say here? .. "Isn't..this..guy..carrying the letter a..dink."
Well it says here your feet don't exist.
"What are you going to do now Charlie?" - "We're going to like this see?"(typical early ganster talk ie. James Gagney, bugs bunny's Mugsy)
Crow - "So Jimmy, do you like your kneecaps?"
Go Speed Farmer! Go Speed Farmer! Go Speed Farmer, go!
How many times have you gone rooting through your junk drawer muttering to yourself, 'Where'd I put that gun?'
High energy prop comic Carrot Top is also packed in ice.
But what about my five dollars?!
"Oh, it's the three hard-boiled eggs she ordered."
"And now, Thom Mcann and the Payless Orchestra, with Cole Haan on the saxophone. Then, the Naturalizers will sing something by Johnston & Murphy..."
"Walt Disney interviewing another Snow White..."
"Can I show you something in a Size Me?"
"This guy's made more money today than I did all the way through High School!"
"Well, it isn't meat, but I suppose I better buy some of these just for appearances. (Oooh, cucumbers...)"
"I love you, Earl."
"Uh, not here, Tom."
"Now, Duck News! Here's Hugh McQuacken!"
"Wait a second! She has a pig in a blanket on her head!"
"It says here your feet don't exist."
"I'm going to build a blimp and fight the Nazis!"
Hail, Truck Farmer!
Mom's in the bottle again.
I'm going to run away to Kansas and become a ventriloquist!
Went to store. Scotch in fridge.
Penile Replacement Corporation Pictures presents...
YOUR MOTHER'S IN DETOX! COME QUICKLY!
Went to store. Scotch in fridge.
Penile Replacement Corporation Pictures Presents...
"I never had a mother myself..." I was torn from the thigh of Zeus.
J. Edgar Hoover goes shopping...
Later, this device is used to beat back the workers...
Aaaghhh, it's Killdozer! Clint Walker, nooooo!!!
"The makers of this film also accuse HITLER,TOJO, MUSSOLINI. We accuse them all. Soon we'll accuse STALIN."
"I Accuse My Parents was brought to you by BOONE"S FARM."
"A preteen is sent to work, her beauty will soon fade."
"I'm from CANADA, what am I doing here?"
jimmys cheating on me!!!
Welcome back to the 12th Annual Essay Awards Ceremony.
But it was your birthday LAST year.
HEY! I WON THE ESSAY CONT...........Oh.
The vodka clashes with the coffee table.
"She's drunk" "It's funny!"
Soylent Green is made out of people!
'ere now, what're ya doin' in a Cocteau film, boy.
Go home to your mother, that's a good lad.
Problem with mob... on lam.
I accuse you, Joel! Now, carefully hand over the hamburger sandwich. Don't let him forget the french fried potatoes garnish.
I'm up here honey with the D.T.s. Can you get the yellow lizard out of the bathroom?
"Somethings bothering you what is it, homesick?" Uh, I found a toenail in my hamburger.
"I had a lot of guys come in here broke never sent em' away hungry" Got em' piled out back.
"You interested in something in shoes?" No a fish sandwich what ya think?
"Well your honor I don't believe my mother and father should have ever had a child." I was abused as a zygote.
I love my rubber apron.
Go speed farmer, Go speed farmer, go speed farmer, go!
Stupid trees God I hate em'. Early tractor pulls not that much fun, this is the free style competition.
I'd like to deposit some guilt and withdraw some denial, please.
You got a bean in your pocket, I know it!
This is a message from the other kids in the essay contest, Jimmy!!
"Because of our truck farmers, the vitamins and minerals to be found in fresh vegetables--" Are poisoned.
Joel, I don't understand the Holy Spirit. Is it a bird?
I'm peakin' man.
*squak* [over Kitty's solo] All cheese busters are now $1.45
*squak* [over Kitty's solo] Kowalski, table for seven.
"...fourteen billion...fifteen billion..."
Hey, Showbiz, can we get our food over here?
My mom doesn't drink! (unprovoked, @31:08)
"Fix mother a drink James, I'm exhausted" from drinking so much.
[Frantically intervening] "Dad!" ...freshen your drink?
"I, uh, see you use the same bank I do." Ohh, well, they're YOUR checks.
QUACK QUA QUA QUACK QUACK QUACK [every time someone enters or leaves the room, setting off the motion-sensor duck]
She's got a closet full of dead shoe salesmen!
(Ladies and Gentlemen I have a BIG surprise for you this evening)
I'm Rudolf Hess.......
Soooooo.... Jimmy,.... do ya like your knee caps ?
Has anybody seen a truck yet ?
Life on the lamb - An affordable vacation!
Wow, this is one successful shoe salesman! Open mouth, close sale!
Accusingly yours, Jimmy.
Jimmy is suddenly seized with an essay idea...
So then my mom says to Roosevelt and Churchill, she says,'what about some kind of lend/lease program?'
Hey come on in, we invited the cast from Gigi over!
This tomato's highly deformed, but cut off the eyes and it's good eatin'
Don't see many of these trees anymore. Oh well, down it goes!
How you like my swinging church, son?
Thank God I'm white!!!!
Maybe they should have sworn him in.
Yes, Satan, speak to me through this song.
Well, he did win that essay contest.
I went and liberated France while you were dancing.
Seventeen hundred lies later.
Oh, yeah, bring it in! That's right, set the hook!
Eleanor Roosevelt's pissed.
Suddenly the Thin Man enters.
I like jell-o.
Praise the Truck Farmer! Bow down before him!
"Here in Texas there's an additional problem." Texans.
Easter Bunny Films presents...
Oh what now? How can I get a blowout when I'm just sitting here!?
I know how toast works... heh heh
So I just don't get the Holy Ghost, is it a bird or something?
It's my birthday mister.
LIAR! LIAR! LIAR!
Here's a five inch nail for dessert...go nuts