519 - Outlaw of Gor
|Short - none|
Riffs you quote here will appear randomly in the above.
Poor little guy looks disoriented! Let's go find your daddy!
Annoying in ANY dimension.
No one backs up like... The Outlaw.
We cracked the time-space continuum and passed the savings on to YOU!
What do have to say for yourself?
I'm not dead yet.
Yeah, it's fun until somebody dies.
"Where the HELL am I?" You're the HELL HERE!
Hup! Stunt misfire.
"I saw that mountain yesterday."
It's clearly following us!
"I'll drop you off, okay."
Oh, will I drop you off.
Oh, shoot, just locked myself in.
Sister Mary Jack Palance.
He's wearing a denim housedress!
Oh, we have worm sign!
That's not him! Good thing they brought his stunt double in!
Yeah, but he fights good. Too bad he wasn't the star of the film.
Now...if you'll...excuse me... I've got to go tear...my agent...a new...
I mean...how could they pre-empt Dr. Quinn, Medicine Woman two weeks in a row! It just doesn't make sense!
Oh, they're making THOSE! There's a great need for those.
The Bataan Nature Walk.
We have worm sign!
You mean so much to me in so many ways. I know we haven't been close lately. You're hurting from the hurt that is everywhere. Hurting everyone. Don't hurt.
Let's watch them from a different angle. Yep. They're still slaves.
Hi, Rog - hi, Dwayne...
Mmm - (smack!) - you taste like bronzer...
Oh - stuck in a Wizard of Id cartoon, huh?
The merchandise started it!
Mmm - great driftwood!
THAT is NAUGHTY!
My mom says we have to go home now... dink...
"Hot. Tired. Thirsty." Be-loin-clothed.
The queen is being penny-wise and pound-foolish. There have got to be capital cost in getting new slaves.
I think all this in-fighting is hurting the National Organization of Women.
So where's the little king's room?
Yes, but is it art?
"Don't these people ever floss? Savages.."
"Good one Cabot, you just set fire to the Boy Scout Jamboree."
"Aw man, Barnaby Jones had better fight scenes than this movie!"
"Hey don't laugh, we're Fabio!"
Wake up! The bus is gone, Mom has to drive you and she's mad!
Okay, I liked Newsies AND Swing Kids! I was in Starlight Express!
Arrakis. Dune. Desert planet. ...the long version.
Deep in the heart of Texas!
Touch me again, you pull back a bloody stump, kid.
Where's the little king's room?
I wanna go back to the Pullman!
You know, you really undermine your authority when you put BUD in the middle of your name.
Who requested that their names be shown at the crescendo of the musical score!
I've come to chew bubble gum and kick ass. And I'm all out of ass
I live to serve, your legginess.
Look. Here's your problem.
Look at my split-top butter-top hat!
Remember to rotate your men every ten thousand miles.
I wonder if there were actual suicides on this film...
Oh no, they're on the Moon Zero Two set!
I thought so.
*Cabot barely hits his opponent's sword with his knife*
I think even that guy's bones are fleshy.
Whose leg is that?
Now which old guy are you?
"I've been waiting for this day..."
Since this morning!
They're being welcomed by the cast of Fame.
He's bludgeoning the sand...
Cabot, no one would see if you killed him right now!
They'd probably give him a free drink at the Pullman.
I get one call to my tanning booth!
Honey, I Shrunk the Nelson!
'See, it's dark - there and there'
'I am soooooo heterosexual'
Mike, will you make me my own jack-booted dominatrix?
Fabio fever---catch it!!
You know liturgical dance is really weird.
But it brings in the parishioners.
You got that right.
Think there's any chance Barney Rubble there could go through the windshield?
See I'm guessing that the Crispi guy in the middle is gonna go home, put on a pan of mac & cheese and fall asleep.
Why did I come as a Cardinal....
I hate this movie already.
"What the hell's 'Gor?'"
It's the hell here.
Thanks, Myrna. Nice hat.
"Like your friend, Watley?"
That hurt, little sidekick.
He always acts like a baby when he doesn't get his way.
Well, the Cabot thing seems to have died down.
Don't these people ever floss? Savages.
Here come the judge!
I have come to chew bubblegum and kick ass. And I am all out of ass.
Well, he's good for parts...
"Personally I think Cabot is kinda overrated..."
Yeah, they got pretty decent chicken fingers here...
"I can make you far more than a slave." You can be my juggler.
"That guy's the photo negative of Herve' Villechaize."
"Pelvis Girl takes her position. . ."
Tell me, how do they make love on your planet... Is it very different than ours?
Well, I'm speaking hypothetically...
Hay-eey CABB-booot! (Ref: Costello to you youngens)
"We teach at the same school."
"Man, Barnaby Jones had better fight scenes than this movie!"
"...And so, The Osmonds are marched from Utah."
"Huh. She must be a goalie."
"A sword, a gel pack, and a stuntman, all for $1.25!"
"Wouldn't it be great if you were stuck in another dimension with an annoying guy and he brought beer?!"
He's wearing Judy Jetson's skirt.
"Oh, Idaho potato. Thank you."
"Good one, Cabot. You just set fire to the Boy Scout Jamboree."
"Oh, that's right. You know, you can catch more slaves with honey than you can with vinegar."
Oh, check out in back. Wash and go, Pert Plus!
Do you have a Camero?
The whole halter top thing just isn't happening for him.
Look at my split-top, butter-top hat!
The world's first successful paper mache village!
Ho, ho! That's real butt!
Strut, pout, put it out that's what you want from women.
"I have been cleaning and adjusting the vibrations of the home stone."
And I'm out of Pine-Sol.
"What have you done with The Prisoner??" "Uh, we cancelled it, it was too obscure."
Tom Servo - "Don't worry kids, We'll have lions eating christians if you just be patient."
Mike - "Jeff Conway is a college professor who's secret life catches up with him in...Deathspank!"
Crow - "Don't want to be pleasured by the slave girl...WHAT WAS I THINKING!?!"
(After seeing a 10-foot tall phallic symbol, the evil Queen says -- via one of the bots --) Oh God, please invent the battery!
17:17 Oh, I can't find the Christmas tree star anywhere!
Personally I think Cabot is overrated.
Honey, I shrunk the Nelson.
I am my own woman.
Tom - "Oh, he looks like a little angel."
Mike - "He looks like a gravy boat!"
Crow - "Hey, that looks like"
Mike - "Hey, hey, hey, not a word!"
Tom - "Well, it's just that I envy that structure."
Crow - "It's Doctor Freud's office."
Mike - "Oh God, please invent the battery!"
(Visual aid...Screen capture)
It's Dr Freud's office!
-Oh, I'm going to do more than that.
"-What are you going to do?"
Ngah! Wooh, a rare triple.
Lambada, the forbidden dance.
Watch out for snakes!
Don't make a crack about that.
-I'm out here with my little warrior!
Yea, for truly this is the land of Dairy Queen.
Now to preheat the oven and... Grease the panhh.
Harry Alan TOOWERS!
"Y'know, actually... I think this is Italy."
"Y'know, during this shot there've been three governments."
"Italian actors pretending to be gay American cops!"
"Honey, did you close all the time portals?"
I crap bigger than this movie!
Some men just can Not wear a bustier.
Tour my highness?? Why you rude little man!
... it's just that I envy that structure.
Oh... it's a different Cabot.
"Gor is a harsh world, and she breeds harsh people..."
"...but the rents are reasonable."
"Would you check out the legs on that blonde at the end of the bar-- huh? I mean, she is awesome!"
"That's my brother, Man!"
"They make such a production out of everything!"
"But it's 'Limited,' Thank Goodness."
So woman is free to love who she wants? Well, that it says in Cosmo.
Aaaaw, he looks like a little angel ! He looks like a gravy boat.
Oh, maybe we should keep interviewing for this King position
"Master, allow me to give you pleasure." "I'm not your master." No, you see, freedom is -- wha the -- PLEASURE???
(In voice of Jack Palance) After 4 days of shooting, finally got script today. Guess what, I'm not playing Thomas Aquinas. I'm supposed to be some kind of freakin' Wizard !
Isnt this just typical of wherever this is?
He looks like a large mouth bass, going after an injured minnow or something.
Dont worry kids, we'll have lions eating Christians, if you'll just be patient.
Pull over now, I desire a nutroll.
"You are a very strange warrior." In fact, you're a freak.
Shhhhhhh, hes conducting Flight of the bumblebee.
"Kill him, kill him, kill him, kill him."
I'm confident, dry, and secure!
"I can make you a hero again." Or I can make you a fluffernutter.
It's time for The Brutal Gourmet.
Ah, the golden days before sewers.
"You know how to party, huh?" You just put your lips together and drink.
Hey, this is where Fred Flintstone works!
"What have you done to the prisoner?" We canceled it, it was too obscure.
She's sleeping her way to the bottom.
Hmm, you smell like comic books.
I worry about a superhero named Kevin who drives a Camaro.
"He's dead." ...Jim.
"Get out of here....you disgusting WORM!"
All right, I'm out of the film!! Yes!!
I have come to chew bubblegum and kick ass, and I'm all out of ass.
"Oh for crying out loud..."
"They're staying at a Red Roof Inn...!"
My seed pod is opening...
Excuse me, sir, I'll have to check your package! Wow....it's big.
The littlest Buffalo Shot of them all!
That guy is a professional third wheel.
Yuck! He dislocated his mandible!
"Oh! Cabot! Cabot! Cabot." - So, Cabot then, eh?
Boy, I could go for a shortstack!
Mmm...mnah...these candles are good.
Sand Nazis, I hate these guys.
So our hero's name is.... what, again?
Buffalo Shots! Think about it, won't you?
OK, I'll just follow your butt.
Whoa! Not anymore I won't!
Cry Freedom 2: The Armageddon
He looks like a happy pig!
The book says the dove should come out now. Crap!
Where the Hell am I?
- You're the Hell HERE!
Oh jeez, now they need slaves just to clean up the other slaves!
Hey.....CABOT!!!!!!! I've been a baaaaddddd boy!
Get out of here, you disgusting WOOORM.
Jack, you are way off script!
Mr. Palance, you're hurting me!
She's sleeping her way to the bottom!
oooh I am so heterosexual
He's got soul patches on his back...
Hey, don't laugh! We're Fabio!
"Cabot?" "Cabot!" "Cabot!!" "Cabot?" "Cabot!" ... Nope, doesn't ring a bell.
Whoa, that woman could sublet that hat!
Sorry folks, we simply could NOT afford to have special effects...