616 - Racket Girls
Riffs you quote here will appear randomly in the above.
"It's neat how one Senate hearing can wipe out all of organized crime."
"Well, at least we didn't have to see these guys wrestle in little outfits, huh?"
"Well, then again..."
"Perhaps a... woman dressed like... a peccary and the other dressed like a parrot playing Mahjong."
"All this for a car loan!"
"If Russ Meyers [sic] had directed Clare Boothe Luce's The Women."
"I get my partner: Rusty. Hey, Rusty!"
"Huh... She crazy. She flip me over!"
"Hi, Roy! Who's the beard?"
" 'Give to me your leather/Take from me my lace.' "
"Larry, you're a dullard."
Is this the induction film when you go to Hell?
"Where did it go? He's a sorcerer!!!"
No, I...I'm seeing it too...Me too...This would turn KD Lang hetero!
Dance with me...I want to be your partner...can't you see....
Is this in danger of being confiscated while we watch it?
Well, frankly, neither of you has a chance for love, ever. So! You're available, Sue?
(laughs) It's that guy's 7th year in an unpaid internship...
Peaches, you're the good idea.
I prefer the traditional Hamlet...
Sir? Sir, please get back to your seat. S-sir??
(cracking geek voice) I'm not mature?
Oh, no! That's us in the corner! That's us in the spotlight!
The crowd's enthusiasm is quickly dimmed!
"I'll see your Mr. Gomez."
And I'll raise you a Gonzalez.
Oh, it's my turn to act.
"What are you thinking about?"
Save her, Peaches!
I resent that apartment!
Sh! People are wrestling!
Hee haw, hee haw, hee haw, hee haw.
Choo choo choo choo, Choo choo choo choo...
Why doesn't he just walk backwards?
This is gonna be so great! This is what it's all about---AAAHHHHH!! Iggy Pop!
We love popular songs!
She's got the best leg flop thing in the business.
Alright people, we've completely lost lights, let's roll film.
Someone's learning typing in the next room.
"I'm sorry Boss." I killed that horse again.
There's some heroine I've had my eye on.
Cafeteria ladies on their off hours.
Would you take off the rubber nose and glasses please?
I had twenty bucks on you!
God that BUGS me when you do that!
The tepid embrace tells me they're ready for marriage.
"Oooooh, someone's a bitch, and it's not me, and it's not Joe."
"Alright --- stand in the place where you live."
"Peaches is getting clingy."
Is this in danger of being confiscated while we watch it?
Some guys are so ugly, that HAD to become thugs.
"I can do anything I please." Maybe I'll protract this scene a little longer.
She looks like a Romulan!
There's a little bit of Yogi Berra in there too!
The secret forbidden backroom of your Aunt's house!
I'd rather see Bob Hoskins in that sweater...
::silence:: You know, it's the music that really brings this scene to life.
Well, Heidi is all grown up! Heh heh heh.
Those of you who never associated sexuality with your Great Aunt, here it is!
He's from Barcelona...
Woah, is this me and my head trying to cope with this movie, or is this actually happening on the screen??
Marines, we are leaving!!
Yes, it's the annual 'Running Of The Breasts'.
This would turn k.d. lang hetero.
College is going to change EVERYTHING!
"How do we know when we've done it?" Oh, boy. Back to the dolls!
Frankly, neither of you has a chance for love ever.
"Can't we settle these differences after we're married?" "And if you aren't successful?" Well, there's drinking and porno.
You saw my boing?
Cupid is anal!
"Have either of you ever been in love before?" "Well...." Does my uncle count?
"My folks don't understand the way I feel." I feel like rhino hide.
Welcome to- "As Far As You're Gonna Get".
"Are You Ready For Marriage?" Yeah, I'm sick of sex anyway.
Now we are gathered here today to get through this thing called 'life'..Electric word, 'life', it means forever and that's a mi- ..Uh, excuse me..wrong speech.
Okay, we're gonna meet back here and go to Chili's, alright? You drive? Nah, I can drive. I can drive.
Bobby Orr's Electric Marriage. Real marriage action!
"Well, I'll be frank with you" I have no bladder control.
Music? Why here? Why now? WHY US?
Ukraina, my bitter homeland! Your strip mines, your big reactors...!
No wonder people went nuts over The Beatles! This was all there was!
That's Clare's wrestling name; her real name is "Savage Venus".
Two dominant maie women fight for supremacy!
"Screen Classics"? We'll decide if it's a screen classic, alright?
(38:00) "Yes, why don't we do it in the middle of the road,no one will be watching us."
"Yes it's the annual RUNNING of the BREASTS."
(13:48) CROW: "YOU SAW MY BOING"
(SHORT) Marriage Councilor: "Have you ever been in LOVE before?"
CROW: "Does my uncle count?"
(SHORT) "I could have my chin SMALLERED."
"LISA LOEB, I thought it was COURTNEY HOLE !!"
Not many professional sports people just let out screams during a match.
"Sey, yu look like a swell deesh to mee."
"Do we know each others peculiarities?" I like to sleep with my head in a catcher's mitt.
Sorry, I turned into the Devil for a second.
Y'now, maybe this is titillating to lower animals.
Ehhh, I guess if you were a gay guy who liked truckers you might find these women attractive
Suddenly their marriage is "The Eiger Sanction".
I asked King Vitamin to join us.
It's Campustown, Jake.
"It's the folks, they-- we had a terrible scene." I got kicked out of L7.
This movie has taken the joy out of looking at someone's hinder!
Shut up, Iris.
"Do we really understand marriage?" - That's the breaded thing with the mayonnaise, right?
"If the engagement period gives you the time to work things out together--" I'll be shocked.
... and so students, just plug in the quadratic formula and... um, EXCUSE US!
"Radio Free Europe"
♫ College is going to change everything...!! ♫♬
In matters of the heart, which of the Three Stooges do you base your decisions on?
Women on the verge of a three-point take-down.
So the shower is a formal high heel occasion.?
I like stuff too.
How many of GODS' laws does this violate ?
Champion stud chicken Man-O-War..
Ohhhhhh... THAT one WAS PERSONAL.
It's the Hitlers'
"And what about Sue and me?" - She's suing him?!
Strut, pout, put it out, that's what you want from Grandma!
This movie was the "Jaws" of its day, people were afraid to go to Women's Wrestling!
Sir, have you seen anyone who may have tampered with ladies' wrestling?
These shots were rejected from "Monster A Go-Go"!
Ha, ha! Must be the same magic bullet that got Connolly!
This is Quentin Tarantino's most shocking film!
OK, people, we've completely lost the lights... LET'S ROLL FILM!
That's for makin' this scene go on so long!
Y'know, I don't much like the new Star Search category!
Did you know George Will reveres this sport?
My loins will never stir again!
Y'know, Peaches has a fresh, natural stupidness that isn't forced or contrived...!
I'm being turned on by a woman who is long dead!
This film awakened Eleanor Roosevelt's sexuality!
It's like a stag film produced by the League Of Women Voters!
I'd rather see Golda Meir in that getup!
Is that Playskool's "My First Desk"?
OK, the victor will drag half of the loser back to her back porch and present it to her owner!
OK, ladies, no spraying!
Same seats... so we don't have to shoot anymore footage...!
Quick, Joe! Think of something cute and ethnic!
Did the idea of location scouting ever come up?
Location scout had his hands full, didn't he?
Y'know, I can't believe how small Mr. Big is!
Hi, we're here to do "Greater Tuna"!
Yes, it's the annual Running Of The Breasts!
Where's Benny Hill when you need him, huh?
Y'know, when Ed Wood saw this, it was like when Truffaut saw "Citizen Kane"!
Ooohhh, she moves fast for a lineman!
Meanwhile, Audrey Hepburn was making "Roman Holiday"!
I believe this is NOT GRATUITOUS!
This was back when undergarments had NO erotic appeal!
I never saw my grandma naked, but... this'll do!
This could make K.D. Lang hetero!
Scenes cut from "The Turning Point"...
I prefer the traditional "Hamlet"...
I saw this match on Lifetime...
Remember when Bobby Riggs wrestled Billie Jean King?
I knew that when baseball went on strike, other sports would take over!
Some guys are so ugly they HAVE to become thugs!
C'mon, get some Jello, or oil, or mud, or something...!
-Is this The Thrilla In Manilla?
-No, it's more like The Snooze In Santa Cruz!
I'd say the DAR fundraiser is going quite well!
By the way, the referee is Charlie Watts...
Looks like just another day at Madonna's house...
Never make light of boing, son.
But it takes more than this 'boing'... Sometimes there's a SHPLURT!
its always awkward when you have to break up with your Grandma
That bra's about as sexy as a concrete abutment.
I wonder what country this takes place in...
"Oh, sorry! I was in Denang!"
"But where's the Rubber Band?"
That's the spirit we need in our hookers!
Is this the induction film when you go to hell?
...although I AM going to go crawl in the sewer- but thats a COMPLETE coinsidence
Ironically...well, actually, there is no irony.
This director has out Wooded Ed Wood!
"You have to wonder what the rejected footage looked like." "What rejected footage?"
We love popular songs.
"It's gone!" "Where did it go?!" WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!
Boing Boing Boing Boing...
I worship Cthuhlu.