608 - Code Name Diamond Head
| Full Episode: | |
| Short - A Day at the Fair: |
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Eps:
323,
611,
608,
210
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Comments (66) Best Riffs (211)
Riffs you quote here will appear randomly in the 
above.
There's a lot of money here, Mitchell!
Bob and Johnny are putting the finishing touches on their calves.
Adding Hooker Headers and decals!
"Let's go eat something grey."
I don't know why, but that killed me.
"Whoa, big Johnson!"
"It's a Mercury."
"Big Mercury, then."
We're on the brink of two people actually interacting for the first time in this movie!
Boy, it's tough when Barnaby Jones out-actions you.
Dear bartender, I like you. Do you like me? Check one.
Is this a bar where nobody knows your name?
Well, we finally got that horrible painting off the ceiling. You know the Angelos were here, and they love that sort of thing. But there's this lovely natural brick underneath...
"Now the day's work is over, and it's time for fun." So they leave the fair.
"Now the judge is picking out the champion of them all."
Ah am The Greatest!
"The judge wants to see Johnny's calf in the open."
He realizes he had not known cow until this day!
"Now the boys take their calves to the arena, where the show is beginning."
First, it's the evening gown competition.
We have some tape of the calves playing on the beach earlier this week...
Come on, you chunk of dog food! I've got a year's allowance on you!
"These bass would make great fishing. If only they were in the creek back home..." Well, see, they were in the creek. But then they were caught. That's why they're here.
You want bangs this time, honey? Let's go with bangs. Bangs are so nithe.
Taking a Greyhoud to Hawaii wasn't such a good idea...
Look at this wonderful pepper mill I have here! There's a story behind it: I went over the hills into Soviet Georgia and I got it from a little old woman with a club foot, we talked and we laughedโฆ.
"Paragon Cable! Just here to drill through your hardwood floors."
"Look, just take your last paycheck. I'm sorry, but you ate out of the bus tub."
[snort] [snort] [snort] โฌ โญ "A sprinkle a day... Keeps odor away..." โญ โฌ
I'll just call her and find out what the whole ring/wax thing means.
"Too soon, the rides are over." The lawsuits begin.
A wheel slices into the crowd, killing three!
"What's this?" Evil! "Homemade cakes." Oh.
Looks like he's got about... ohh... fifteen cents in his pocket, there...
'The Eiger Sanction' had more Hawaiian locations than this!
โชโซHere we are now, Entertain us! I feel stupid, And contagious!โชโซ
"Code Two: Tree may be in Paradise." "the hell does that mean? over..."
Somebody told me I had the personality of one of these so I'm curious.
" British, Irish, Australian..." - French, Italian, Poppy Seed, Hot Ranch.
You and your chaperone will travel to what is apparently Hawaii!
"First she feels the cake."
Then she rubs it into her hair!
This the fairground, where the fair is held. "Any questions so far?"
He's wearing Mary Tyler-Moore's pantsuit!
"Judging cakes ought to be fun." But this woman sucks the joy out of it.
Let me guess. The last words in this movie are gonna be 'Ah-ha ha-ha ha...ha!'
"He knows who I am, and he knows who you are." And he knows who he is.
"Brother Bob is interested in the butterfly exhibit." Too interested.
This is a job for Regular Guy!
"THE COAST GUARD,for men who are to chicken to join the NAVY..."
"Well it's been nice bein' here in downtown FARGO, but I should be getting back to HAWAII..."
TONIGHT!!! One of these three contestants will find out WHERE THEY'VE SEEN THIS GUY!!!
Oh! This looks like a good place to put up a roadside poison gas stand, don't ya think?
That's either the world's worst haircut or the world's worst wig.
I'm ODing on intrigue!
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during the short:
LISTEN TO THE BAND!!!
(great Mike Nesmith song)
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The cloth of gold is a real species of shellfish. It's related to the geographer's cone snail. Both species' venom really can kill humans and there's no antidote.
Just in case you were wondering. :)
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Given this movie it's Amazing Ian McShane has the career he does today.
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Dr Sherman is the same guy Scotty showed the formula for transparent aluminum to in Star Trek IV: Planet of the 80's. http://www.scifihistory.net/uploads/3/0/6/7/30676431/8846347_orig.jpg
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Actually all of it is shot on Oahu, one of industrial shots is Sand Island...there's good, bad and ugly everywhere. Swearengine back before Deadwood.
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The 'He who smelt it, dealt it' line in the first host segment brought me right back to grade school. Somehow, hearing it from Mike and the 'Bots is much more entertaining.
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"It's the man in the hat exhibit."
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I finally figured out where the guy was from who the bots were trying to figure out. He's the guy who plays Victor Neuman in Young and the Restless.
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Hey, wait a second. Mike and the bots have the same roast pig in the final host segment that Dr. F. made for his mother last week!
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I watched this movie before bed last night and woke up this morning to see that Ian McShane had been cast in the American Gods series. I thought to myself "Surely not the same one in this turkey.", but nope. THIS guy will be playing Odin.
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http://www.shoutfactorytv.com/mystery-science-theater-3000/mst3k-code-name-diamond-head/54bd4f7a69702d070c4c6400 - it's streaming on Shout Factory right now
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I still love bad spy movies, but whew... this one was bad!
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A spy in the guise of a yahoo
Tries to hold back bad gas in Oahu.
Perhaps he can win
The heart of Fan-Fan Nguyen
But I've run out of rhymes for "Oahu."
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Mike, 'Bots... don't be so insecure. Our eyes may wander to shirtless villains now and again, but we always come back to you. ;)
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I don't think that in this nor in the General Hospital shorts do they make a single 'The Invaders' reference.
Weird!
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The implication at the end that Frank can walk off being electrocuted down to just a skeleton much better than Dr. Forrester can is quite fitting, don't you think?
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I just noticed that the brushes Frank and Dr. F. are using to clean themselves at the end are actually the big push brooms that you screw onto a handle. You can even see the holes. :)
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A Kentucky Cycle reference? Nothing is obscure to MST3K
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I think farming can explain why Father is eighty-five.
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"Pity we don't have an apple to put in his mouth." It doesn't really seem like a comeuppance if you're echoing a fat joke back to a guy who isn't fat.
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Even for this show, there's a LOT of Minnesota references in this one.
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It's ridiculous how obvious the agents are when they're following someone. Zulu is about as subtle as a kid crying in a crowd.
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HOLD EVERYTHING! Is the farmer in the short also the Frog Leg Cafe owner in Red Zone Cuba!?
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Did anyone else notice the asian lady is the same from the star trek episode where Kirk touches her tears and becomes her slave?....oh and buddy with the mustache was on young and restless lol.
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This is one of those things where the director has only the vaguest idea what a "plot" is, but decides if he strings together a bunch of random happenstance and dumb code names it should be good enough.
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I can't get that stupid music out of my head! And, uh, is the "Hawaiian Punch" in the closing segment a can of pie filling?
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I used to live in Hawaii. You may not believe it, but this kind of thing happened every week.
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uh...let's see....uh Sharon Wilkerson, Debbie Johnson, 'kay go right in ladies...!
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Also, they missed a good opportunity for a Sun Ra reference at 14:30 or so: "Up! Up! Up in the air!" (That's almost exactly a line from the song called "Rocket Number 9", so it's not like there's any shortage of Sun Ra references on the show, but still)
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"Rotting Industrial Grandma" would be a great name for a death metal band.
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Mean boy scout troop leader Mike is hilarious!
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I kept getting distracted with the villain that I swear was Timothy Dalton's doppleganger. At any moment I expected a shaken not stirred exclamation.
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Why doesn't Diamond Head get help from T.C. or Rick?
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Why does this make me want to be in a made-for-tv movie? What's... happening... to..... me...???
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I laughed WAY too much at "How much is a four worth? you know?"
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"A Day at the Fair" might very well be my favorite short! There are more laugh-out-loud moments here than any other that leap to mind. I was literally bent over laughing uncontrollably during the cow contest part.
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Frank and Dr. F...YeOUCH! Soap in the eyes...!
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I'm impressed that the Lovejoy TV series was shown in USA ... I remember this show from years back (when living in UK) :P It seems surprising that a british TV show like this went international. Cool though huh!
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it's Blackbeard from Pirates of the Caribbean
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Could someone PLEASE explain what a Montclaire moment is!
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1:27:38 Teets! Dick! For the twelve-year-olds among us. 8>]
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I know a thing or two about a thing or two!
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Frank and Dr. F. and their OCD trip - Clayton looks very different without his glasses... I like the way they fly out of his wash tub during his mad frenzy to de-germ himself. Almost as funny as the pop can stuck in Crow's eye.
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Although Mike pointed it out at the wrong place in the end credits, this WAS filmed entirely on location in Hawaii! Unlike Hawaii 5-O or Magnum PI, it showed the real place, not just swanky hotels, clubs and beaches. Victor Newman had about 4 lines; he looked like a svelt Tom Selleck to me.
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CORRECTION!!!! I just looked it up, HANS GUDEGAST was the Rat Patrol mustached guys real name, and he played a German desert commander named Hans Dietrich....too many Hans' lol
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Great MST3K episode, bad made for tv movie lol. Love the 70's. Trivia time: Just so you know,Lovejoy was a bad tv series where Ian McShane ala Lovejoy aka Codename Tree (great codename btw lol) played a cop or P.I. or sumthin'. Series lasted a few yrs. believe it or not! The big tubby Hawiiaan dude is ZULU aka the original KONO from Hawaii 5-O, and NOO Grace Park is not the original KONO.She just likes playing guy parts like in the re-make of Battlestar Galactica she played BOOMER (another guy part, black guys part actually).The hott chinese lady Frances Nugyen or whateva was on the original Star Trek as "Elaan Of Troyus" aka the princess chick whose tears made you love her if you touched them. Roy Thinnes aka Diamond-Head also was on Battlestar Galactica for 5 seconds as a crimminal/demolitions expert on that "ice Station" eipsode. Ward Costello aka the fat old man who was Codename Aunt Martha or sumthin' lol was Admiral Quinn from STTNG season ONE. He kicked Riker's ass into a coffee table while possessed by those throat parasites! And last but not least Eric Braeden aka That Mustached-Guy, aka The "Rat Patrol" Guy and like someone else mentioned The Young & Restless Soap Opera star Victor Newman, but did you know his real name was actually Hans Gruber or sumthin' like that! Maybe I'm thinking of the original "Die-Hard" movie but I know his name was originally Hans sumthin' like that! He changed it after The Rat Patrol show went off the air I guess because it/HE sounded TOO German but then again he did play a German desert commander on the show soo? That woulda been weird having a guy named Hans playing a wealthy cosmetics CEO on Y&R huh lol. Well thats all for me, until then Zig Heil, I mean toodles :-D
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"A tribute to careful shaving"! Hah!
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So I'm sitting here drinking my morning coffee. Get a big mouthful and suddenly Tom pipes in with "Women are excited at seeing the word 'member'." Bam! Coffee everywhere. I gotta stop drinking while watching these...
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I guess I am odd man out, I actually liked the movie> MST was the icing in the cake! When else do you see David Vincent fight Lovejoy?
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What was that guy in? Young and the Restless! Eric Braeden had been playing That Mustache (aka Victor) for about 15 years when this episode aired.
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this film had a definite 'Riding With Death' vibe, I kept wanting to shout 'leave Robert Denby alone!'
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Me, one minute into the movie: "Gee, that guy looks a lot like Ian McShane!"
Movie, four seconds later: "With guest stars Ian McShane..."
What? How can this be?
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The Crash Test Dummies skit ! ! !
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Don't know where I've seen that guy but he kind of reminds me of Daniel Day-Lewis in Gangs of New York.
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15:00 I prefer ghost-riding the whip.
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Ha-ha... Hitler didn't die in a car.
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Ok, I was prepared to just say "Ian McShame on you" and leave it at that, but then the unabashed lameness of that last scene nearly decapitated me! I think the director just made it up at lunch! And none of them seemed the least bit worried about security for the Korean Ambassador!
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This is still gone? Come on!
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This is also DMCA'd
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Bad "movie!" Bad, bad "movie!" You deserve to be spanked! Ack!!!!!!!!!!!!! I lost a few brain cells trying to follow that little plot there. Good thing I had anatomy homework to help distract me, and rebuild the dendrites!
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at 44:37, did tom call magic voice a sh*thead?
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26:05 If you've ever wondered what This Boy's Life would have been like if it had been rated PG and Robert De Niro's character had been played by William H. Macy-- wonder no more!
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Brad Roberts! That voice! It hurts!!
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I love this episode so much! There's so many things for me in this. Servo singing Nirvana, Victor Newman from Young and the Restless lol...it goes on and on.
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25:23 it's the priest from Harold and Maude-
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A very good underrated episode. 70's made for TV movie that is perfect for MST.