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621 - The Beast of Yucca Flats



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230 laughs

Comments (86) Best Riffs (338)

A good movie for the Drive In crowd.
standardus1 - 17 days ago
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I believe that this was a smash at the drive in theaters, when you got your girl friend in the car and you weren't interested in the movie but your girlfriend and how close you can get before steaming up the windows. There must have been a increase of the population after this movie.


Introducing Petey Plane (and a cast half of which will grace the rest of CF's 'work'
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Yes, ladies and gentlemen; children of all ages----this is Petey's debut (as well as Coleman's), albeit they hadn't started calling him by name yet. Francis, interestingly, lays out in this stunning first effort all his future themes: look for shooting from planes, greasy, ill-lit interiors, coffee real and implied, and pixie-cut women meeting violent ends.


Isabel Rentoul - 10 months ago
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This movie never answered the really important question: Flag on the moon. How *did* it get there?


Eric Allen - 2 months ago
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Whenever I want to enter a deep, dark well of depression, I watch the first ten minutes of any Coleman Francis movie. Any longer than that would be crazy.


800 lb. gorilla - 3 months ago
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folks be doin some obsessin 'round here


David Heckman - 4 months ago
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In which Tor Johnson, hulking misshapen scientist, is mutated into Tor Johnson, hulking misshapen Jewish grandpa. Chilling.


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My Holst keeps skipping.


Funky The Monkey - 6 months ago
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Bugs Bunny tried to save the beast with kisses. It did not work sadly.


Funky The Monkey - 6 months ago
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Well that was some kinky stuff at the end. Real man on man love there.
Trixie: "I like to be alone for a half hour. Leave ape!"


Funky The Monkey - 6 months ago
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At some points of this movie, play "Baby got back".


Funky The Monkey - 6 months ago
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So the beast is just a round corpulent guy with a sick. Open up a buffet and we'll be okay.


Greg Legas - 11 months ago
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Apparently, Coleman didn't know we had entered the age of "talkies". This was actually a silent movie! Instead of a narrator, they should've just had the occasional black screens with white dialogue, as is traditional. Maybe some piano music for accompaniment. That would actually be more "fun" . Worst excuse for a movie in the whole history of MST3K!


B RYE the MST3K Guy - over 3 years ago
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why does it seem the narrators just mentioning things in his field of view..not following a script .....matchbook ...tumbleweed...karma catches up.. he is so random


She blinded me with PROGRESS !!!
Mega Rat2000 - 9 months ago
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Coleman Francis should've filmed this movie in Puerto Rico , I mean how can you get more progessive than casting Tor Johnson ??? Why Progress ISland of course !! But guess 'the Progressive Beast of Progess Island Flats " isn't too impressive.


Veklorr Vigorr - 10 months ago
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PUERTO RICO!!!


Big McLargehuge - almost 5 years ago
5 laughs

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And what the heck is with that bunny at the end? Was that supposed to mean something?!


Eric McNaughton - over 4 years ago
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You know, are we sure this is a Coleman Francis movie? Where is the all-important coffee drinking scene?


The Wost Film of MST3K?
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A lot of people wonder what the WORST film they ever did on MST3K was. IMO, there are five films which are so bad, they've fallen completely off the scale of composition, thoughtfulness, or simple good taste. These films are so bad, they each represent a singular atrocity, and to prioritize any one over the other is to neglect them all. They are, in no particular order:

The Beast of Yucca Flats
Manos: The Hands of Fate
Monster-A-Go-Go
Rocket Attack U.S.A.
The Castle of Fu Manchu

These films are so bad, so incomprehensibly, unfathomably vile, that each one must be seen to be believed. I think you would be right to say that any of these five movies are equally the worst films ever featured on MST3K


Elliott Lindamood - over 5 years ago
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i reallty realy love tor johnson! so much that i'm starting the church of tor johnson!


Jerome Montgomery II - over 4 years ago
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Progeess Island USA music is from NFL Films


Rose Redd - about 3 years ago
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I notice the Progress Island short neglects to mention the native population. It makes it sound like life emerged with Columbus!


"Now the bunny eats Tor..."
Teri Gee - over 2 years ago
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"...and it becomes Night of the Lepus."

Having now seen the RiffTrax Night of the Lepus, I think having that lead to the killer bunnies would make about as much as sense as what happened in the actual movie.


Dragon my Tail 2day - over 1 year ago
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This movie needed just 2 things to be a Box Office Hit. (1) Rowzdower and Tornadoes with Killer Tuna heading towards Yucca Flats. oh and more coffee......


Tor say time to wake up....
Dragon my Tail 2day - over 1 year ago
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You can tell she wasn't a Timex, she took a licking and stopped ticking


A Lush Cocktail Rescue - over 1 year ago
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Laughing hard at there being eight links to the original film.


S.A. Nathe - over 1 year ago
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brilliant episode!!


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Coleman proving once again to make a movie you don't a big budget, special effects, fancy cameras, decent lighting, coherent scripts, character development, thoughtful dialogue, good actors...a plot...*sighs* entertainment.


Yuca Flats: Progress Island USA.....
Dragon my Tail 2day - over 1 year ago
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I bet in the climatic ending Tor jumps without a chute and his hair opens up... after credits it shows Tor and "Coffee ? I like coffee" at a Starbucks


Gratuitous Lurking - over 1 year ago
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Is Tor killing them, or just giving them the biggest dose of tranquilizer ever of all time?

Either way, reach through the screen, Tor, and put me out of my misery...


Fiscal Irony
Donald Petkus - over 1 year ago
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Former Federal official Ben Franklin's basic money management tips must be considered heresy in DC.


Like an SNL skit-
Mitchell - about 2 years ago
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I realize that the 11:30 skit had relevance for the MST3K staff but for us audience members it just lays there.


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"The Beast Of Yucca Flats, Skydivers, and Red Zone Cuba, are but three examples of the many, many godawful films made during this century."
That statement, (particularly the adjective 'godawful') left me in stitches. That is EXACTLY what I would've said.
"What are you watching?"
"Oh, just another godawful film."


Alyssa Who Will Not Be Named - over 4 years ago
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there was no such thing as clinical depression until this movie was made!!


Kelly Slane - over 3 years ago
14 laughs

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"Flag on the moon. How did it get there?" Is one of the quotes I actually use in life, as a general response to other non-sequiters. No one ever gets it, but I laugh every time :)


Stephen A Nathe - over 3 years ago
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i love both of the shorts, but the Puerto Rico one is HILARIOUS!!!


Just Johnny Baca - about 2 years ago
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It sucks to be illiterate and dyslexic. I thought this movie was called "The Yucky Flat Breasts", until I watched the whole thing and didn't see my ex-wife even once.


JOHNNY - almost 5 years ago
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MISSED-RIFF OPPORTUNITY - #37
"Beast of Yucca Flats"
(Actual film line - narration) ... "a man murdered a woman's purse." (WTF??)


7 laughs

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Is there something wrong with me? I don't get tired of watching this episode. Usually I skip the shorts and go straight to the madness that is Coleman Francis' greatest epic. In a way, I almost like this movie.


Joey Thomas Mackie - over 1 year ago
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This movie stops at nothing, and stays there.


Tor
Brad Koss - almost 2 years ago
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I think Tor hit his stride working with Ed Wood and Bella.


Tim Pierce - almost 4 years ago
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1:09:00 shoot first, then shoot again, then shoot again, then shoot again, then reload, then shoot again, then shoot again, then adjust your speed, then shoot again, then shoot again, then ask questions.


Snuffy Wuffykiss - almost 2 years ago
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Time for watch Tor Johnson.


Scott A. Taylor - over 3 years ago
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Ah .. there goes a stupid, stupid movie! Without a doubt this piece of amateurish crap surely deserves a place at the top of the worst, moronic, cow shit ever to be flung at the cinematic fan. I was pretty sure that "Manos" was THE worst .. and may yet still fight for the right of 'Worst movie ever!', but .. it has definitely met it's match with the 'Beast of yucca Flats'.

Coleman Francis, we salute you ... as we make you walk the plank and watch you get eaten by sharks you absolutely talentless prat you!


HypnoHelioStaticStasis - over 2 years ago
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"Time for go to Yucca Flats."


Mitchell - about 2 years ago
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Love how the "brilliant scientist" needs someone to tell him to get in the car when he is being shot at.


Alex Stefanic - over 5 years ago
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Say what you will about Roger Corman, at least his movies are actual MOVIES. Coleman Francis is my pick for worst director of all time.


Leslie Doesn't Get You - over 5 years ago
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I just looked this movie up on IMDB-- That guy that buys a newspaper from the newsboy for no apparent reason-- that was Coleman Francis!


Ozzie Olin - almost 3 years ago
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7 dollars, adjusted for inflation from the time of this short, would be over 65 dollars a week.


Limerick #10
NS - about 3 years ago
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Flag on the moon. How did it get there?
Like all things, it springs up out of nowhere.
As my sickness advances,
I'll blame Coleman Francis
And get my last rites from a wild hare.


James GreyWolf - almost 3 years ago
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There is a long pause in the slaps between Editors and Make up. I wonder. Did Frank collapse at that time, so Dr. F had to pick him up? Or did Dr. F. just have to switch hands? THESE ARE IMPORTANT QUESTIONS. I MUST KNOW!


Roe Walker - about 3 years ago
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I know that I will probably be alone in this, but I think that "The Beast of Yucca Flats", along with the riffing, approaches something close to being a surreal piece of art. All of the camera angles, done specifically to not show the mouth to save the money and work of syncing the audio to the video, along with the incredibly abstract phrases plopped out by the narrator (Coleman himself), just makes this movie hilarious to watch. I wouldn't be able to make it through without the riffing, though, but the riffing adds in another element that just makes it so memorable.

Thank you, Francis Coleman, for trying to cut corners and not work as hard as you could have. In doing it, you have created something much greater, and much worse, than you could have ever imagined.


11 laughs

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Just my opinion, mind you... but I think the Film Anti-Preservation Society (FAPS) is one of the best ideas I've ever heard.


Jinkee Nova - about 3 years ago
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I think this might have been the first one I ever watched, but my memory is so vague. I'm filled with amnesiac nostalgia.


Amse Master - about 3 years ago
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WOW. It's like this movie was tailor-made for riffing on. I think this is my new favorite.


James GreyWolf - about 3 years ago
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Is 24 slaps enough? Does he continue after the cameras shut down?


Ted Chase - almost 4 years ago
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This was listed as the most unwatchable MST3K movie (and that's saying something): http://www.pastemagazine.com/blogs/lists/2013/11/the-10-most-unwatchable-films-featured-on-mystery-science-theater-3000.html
(note: the three Coleman Francis films done on MST3K were ALL on the Top Ten list...)


Big McLargehuge - almost 5 years ago
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So I've decided that this actually isn't a bad movie. Because to be a bad movie, it has to be a MOVIE first. This, I don't know what this is.


JOHNNY - almost 5 years ago
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WAIT jest a garsh-darn sec!!... if the two cops aren't able to climb that rocky hill where they think Tor is and need a plane .. HOW did Tor get up there?


Teri Gee - over 3 years ago
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Is the randomly-killed woman at the beginning of the movie Justine's wife in Red Zone Cuba?


Stereo Catz - over 3 years ago
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FIST, Over the Top, Rocky 5, Tango & Cash, Death Race 2000...


Teri Gee - over 3 years ago
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Take that counter culture!


Magic Mike
Morgan Zindzi T - over 3 years ago
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At 35:19, Mike totally quotes the White Stripes "Icky Thump" 12 years before they wrote the song!
Is "Who's shooting who? What should we do?" from something else as well or is it just dark magic?


Stereo Catz - almost 5 years ago
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So who killed the (Flag on the moon) girl in the first scene?


Roe Walker - over 3 years ago
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I know that someone else has already said this, but how crazy is it that there is basically no scene in this movie where you can see someone's mouth when they speak? They are either way too far out into the distance to see them, or they are off-screen. There are a couple of scenes where someone covers their mouth, too. How difficult would it be to film and edit the movie to make sure that whenever you have someone talk, their mouth can't be seen? Wouldn't it just be easier to have the audio be off?


Elisa Farrington - about 4 years ago
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Well, I will remember this episode for Tor's singing. His renditions of A Horse With No Name, The Wedding March, Make It With You, The Hills Are Alive, One, and The Lonely Goatherd put him right up there with Slim Whitman. I especially like One from The Chorus Line, that he sings with his cane - ♪♫ One...singular sensation... a blee-bleh, bleh-bleh, de bleh. ♪♫


Classicats - almost 5 years ago
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The "11:30" skit is a little on the dull side, but I love the cute little squeak noise Crow does, and his "hum diddy de de, hua hua" again.


Thomas Wack - almost 5 years ago
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I love this episode. Most people say they can't sit through it but I always can. The level of incompetence requires no riffing. It's THAT stifling.


Kimono Dragon - almost 5 years ago
3 laughs

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If only they had Jenny Craig in 1961, Tor would have been a leading man! I about fell over when they said his head has a beer belly!


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"The music of John Phillip Salsa!" That is all.


Frankie DeMario - almost 6 years ago
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This short is a little creepy


Leslie Doesn't Get You - about 4 years ago
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I actually get nervous during the scenes when the parachuter is shooting at the father running below the plane. I just feel bad for that poor guy; he's just trying to find his lost kids. It's the only part of this film that gives my heart a twinge. (Okay, I also worry the guy's gonna shoot the kids accidentally, even though I've seen the episode a few times before.)


Ra Ubasti - over 4 years ago
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Soylent Green Platanos is made out of Progress!!!! You gotta tell em!


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00:29:30 - A great host segment. Made even better because Crow is reading an old issue of Amethyst. It was one of my favorite comics back in the day, naturally ruined when DC decided that it needed to become all dark and "realistic" and stuff.

I held out as long as could slapping a "favorite" on anything from The Coleman Francis Collection. But due to the aforementioned host segment, plus two of the most fabulous shorts ever, I guess I'll just have to give in. :/


Jerome Montgomery II - over 4 years ago
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Mexican guy playing a cuban.


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Gotta love that way Coleman handles law and jurisdiction: "We're fairly certain someone broke the law. Let's go kill someone."


Mike McCain - over 4 years ago
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pretend...to...write...


Desiree Ashcraft - over 4 years ago
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They got good use out of those Hollywood meat slammers!!!!


11 laughs

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So what do y'all think -- Coleman Francis just had a big ol' pile of airplane and skydiving footage lying around, filmed a bunch of takes of people being shot at from airplanes and a wild twist party, and rustled up Tor Johnson?


Leslie Doesn't Get You - over 5 years ago
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Sigh. It's sad, really. This film seems to be Coleman Francis's attempt at art. And how far from the mark it fell. And why did they mention a flag on the moon once and then never again? And how small was that budget that Francis nearly always avoided showing anyone speaking their lines? Could he not figure out how to mike the desert? Or is it like the guys said, a way to avoid having to deal with sound and picture continuity? And why am I even asking all these questions? Why do I care?


Fancy Pantserton - over 4 years ago
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Shoot first...ask Christian Slater...


j davis - over 5 years ago
3 laughs

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Just realized there's a looong callback to SST Death Flight in the Progress Island, USA short. Around twenty minutes into the episode Crow quips about the plane's gear being mushy.


Reconst - over 5 years ago
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The nice thing about the movie is that it's an hour in length.


Jason Edwards - about 5 years ago
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shoot first, ask Christian Slater.


Robert Ferguson - over 5 years ago
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Mike & the bot's,........ They are ASSASSINS with the short(s). If anybody could somehow make what happened to Gen. Custer at Wounded Knee...
"funny" it's these guys.


Gal Dagon - over 5 years ago
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Gypsy's reaction to the wallpaper reminded me of Vonnegut's "Bluebeard." It's been so long that it took me a while to pinpoint what scene I was thinking of and which book it was, in but there you have it. Gypsy's portraial of Rabo Karabekian's reaction to the redecoration of his home took me back almost 20 years.