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Rocket J. Forklift (Paul-Gabriel Wiener)
In Third star to the left, and straight on 'til midafternoon
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Hi there! There's no place for an "about me" thing in the profile, so I'm posting on my own wall. If you're curious enough to come to this page, maybe you want to know something. So here are a few things, in no particular order:

* I have long names. Call me whatever works. I usually go by "Paul." "Rocky" works here. The full screen name is just there to amuse me.

* "Favorite" episodes are unsorted, and somewhat arbitrary. Depends on my mood when I watched. But I'm generally not one to pick favorites. I enjoy something or not, on its own terms. I don't like pitting them against each other to say which is better or not as good.

* I'm fairly open about stuff, and I like getting to know cool people. Feel free to drop me a line, ask questions, check out my FB profile. Or not. Whatever floats your giant turtle.

That's it for now. Have a MSTie day, and keep circulating the AVI files!


Favorite Episodes

  1. The Robot vs. the Aztec Mummy
    196
  2. Phase IV
    55
  3. SST: Death Flight
    75
  4. Robot Monster
    147
  5. Moon Zero Two
    187
  6. Untamed Youth
    131
  7. Cave Dwellers
    415
  8. Pod People
    541
  9. Catalina Caper
    254
  10. Time of the Apes
    262
  11. War of the Colossal Beast
    214
  12. The Unearthly
    190
  13. The Giant Gila Monster
    243
  14. Teenagers from Outer Space
    274
  15. Attack of the Giant Leeches
    207
  16. Hercules Unchained
    175
  17. Mighty Jack
    163
  18. Star Force: Fugitive Alien II
    247
  19. Fugitive Alien
    318
  20. The Magic Sword
    198
  21. Hercules and the Captive Women
    150
  22. Fire Maidens of Outer Space
    215
  23. The Rebel Set
    155
  24. The Human Duplicators
    200
  25. Bride of the Monster
    226
  26. Manos: The Hands of Fate
    659
  27. Warrior of the Lost World
    315
  28. Secret Agent Super Dragon
    211
  29. The Magic Voyage of Sinbad
    207
  30. Operation Double 007
    226
  31. The Girl in Lovers Lane
    215
  32. Gunslinger
    158
  33. Mitchell
    560
  34. The Wild World of Batwoman
    225
  35. Alien from L.A.
    264
  36. Outlaw of Gor
    301
  37. Radar Secret Service
    213
  38. 12 to the Moon
    196
  39. The Skydivers
    263
  40. Last of the Wild Horses
    157
  41. The Starfighters
    226

Recent Comments with recent replies

423 - Bride of the Monster - about 5 years ago
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If there were door-to-door car salesmen, what else was sold door-to-door? Puppies? Dinner plates? Bras? "Ma'am, you look like someone who could use a good, sturdy bra..."


Forum - 3 days ago
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Did you know Rifftrax has a Twitch channel? It's on 24/7. You can watch live with fellow MSTies. If you subscribe to the channel ($5/month, or you get one free with Amazon Prime), it removes ads, gives you access to the last two months of broadcasts, and allows you to join the Discord server. They add a new movie to the rotation every day (it plays at midnight and noon California time).

The Shout Factory channel plays MST3K episodes on Mondays. Kind of like WIT, but they do several episodes from their catalog back to back.


NCNL #6
Forum - 3 days ago
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Ideas for movies.
Forum - about 1 month ago
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What movies would you like to see the show tackle in a future episode?

I'd LOVE for Jonah and the bots to riff Yor, the Hunter From the Future. It has Reb Brown from Space Mutiny, that alone would make for a great episode.


Joel Robinson is an epic dickweed in Soultaker. Discuss.
Forum - about 5 years ago
3 laughs

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So I'm about to reveal myself as the overly analytical shameless dweeb that I am, but I gotta throw this out there. Does anyone else get cheesed off watching Soultaker? Specifically, that whole part where Joel merrily leaves M&tB stranded in space and does so with enough self-righteous bravado to put every televangelist on earth to shame? Okay, so obs M&tB can't actually be rescued since that'd kinda kill the show and stuff, but there were a ton of in-show ways they could have gotten Joel off the ship, kept M&tB aboard, and not had Joel acting like the biggest jackass this side of Castle Forrester. (Hell, at least the peeps on Team Forrester openly admit to being evil\sadistic\batshit insane when *they* joyfully strand people in space!)

Joel's escape in Mitchell was one thing - Gypsy surprise!booted him out to save his arse after he point-blank told her he'd never willingly leave. Okay, fine. But then he shows back up in Soultaker to fix the ship and...what, campaign for a spot on Jerry Springer's "Deadbeat Dads and the Bots Who Love Them" holiday special? He’s so content to gleefully ditch his creations after they get all excited to see him again, it’s flippin' twisted! Major league douche move there, buddy, f'realz.

Am I the only one totally bothered by this? I get that the skit is\was supposed to be lulzy, and maybe on the surface it is, but the undercurrent just feels icky and wrong, like someone put this warped dark twist on J&TB’s usual whimsy and warmth, and not in the “hilariously dark riff that makes you laugh and cringe at the same time” sort of way. It's more like a Mirror Universe sort of way, except this wasn’t a mirror universe! (OR WAS IT?!) IDK. This ep totally puts me off the character of Joel Robinson, or at least makes me wrinkle my nose a little, and that ain't right! Someone PLEASE explain that I'm missing the point. Flame me! Kick my ass! Tell me I'm wrong and tell me exactly why! I hate disliking a character I love, and I want...nay, need to make sense of this madness! (Also, preemptive bronx cheer to anyone who pulls the "Repeat to yourself it's just a show" line. That's only applicable to science facts, not speculative character analysis. So there.)


314 - Mighty Jack - 3 months ago
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Oh man. I can't believe they cut it. About half an hour in, when they're trying to rescue Atari from his cell, suddenly there's an agent in the cell with him, directing the other one to the correct door. Q floods the cell with poison gas, intending to kill Atari and the agent inside with him. But you may be wondering - where did he come from, and why is he trapped inside the cell with Atari? The KTMA version (which also has an extended opening sequence introducing the team and showing how Mighty Jack is launched) has the answer...

Mighty Jack dispatched an agent. He landed on the shore of the island, expertly snuck through the enemy base, located Atari's cell, picked the lock, stepped inside, and proudly announced his success to Atari. He was still rankled that Atari had been so demanding when Q had put him on the radio. Kind of "You challenged me to rescue you? Well, here I am! You can thank me now!" Only to have Atari respond with "You fool!" Instead of holding the door open so Atari could escape, the elite agent of the top secret superhero task force had stepped inside, closing the door behind him. All the training and high-tech gadgetry, and he'd never considered that a prison cell door might have an automatic lock. Now they were both trapped! So the would-be rescuer had to radio Mighty Jack to send a second agent to spring them both.


Forum - 23 days ago
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Does anyone know what made Mike a Head Writer. Does it mean he wrote most of the riffs? Or did he decide which riffs to use? Or did he decide which character spoke each riff? A combination of of all this? I've always wondered what gave him that title.


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They are born, and electronic teaching machines are wired into their brains while they're still infants. They spend the rest of their lives with machines surgically attached to their heads. This movie invented the Borg.


After watching this dang thing 5 times
314 - Mighty Jack - over 1 year ago
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What the hell is Mighty Jack anyway? Is it the sub? Is it the magic jet fighter that apparently has room for 15 people to walk around, and dives under water to hook upmwith the sub? Is it both? Does it refer to the "elite group", which not only includes major hero, captain lickspittle, lieutenant hard-on, and female person, but mysterious cigarette hanging guy, old stoned grinch, and a dozen other assistants? Where are they all? Do they all have staff meetings? What do they do on birthdays: cake and a song, or just a card?
I'll stop asking questions now, which could otherwise go on forever. This is one bewildering mama jamma.


Recent Riffs

311 - It Conquered the World - about 3 years ago
2 laughs

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He never used to make deals with the devil before...


607 - Bloodlust - about 3 years ago
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Thank you for your request to come pick you up. We are sorry to inform you that we cannot...


414 - Tormented - about 3 years ago
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Charles Moffett...


K09 - Phase IV - about 3 years ago
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Servo: Come on, Joel! We're joshing you!
(Does it count as a riff if it's in a host segment? What if it's meta?)


424 - Manos: The Hands of Fate - about 3 years ago
4 laughs

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So. So, I told Gary that I was going on this vacation. So he goes, "Well, then, I'm goin' huntin' with Jeff next weekend." Well, then, that's when we were at Nigh's. Well, then Lou sang Fernando, and Gary, oh he sings so good. You should meet Jeff sometime. Do you like Barry Manilow songs? I know that farmers need rain, but when it's damp like this, my hair just explodes! Just explodes. Ooo, I'm feeling kinda gassy. McNuggets, they make me so gassy, you know all that grease, you know. It really helps if you drink 8-10 glasses of water a day. But you know sometimes I drink 5, sometimes I drink 9 to make up for the other 3 I didn't drink. Coffee and diet drinks don't count, either. You know, this is pretty country, isn't it? You know it's really kind of a blessing in disguise that I didn't get accepted to college, huh? You know, I'm going to have to revise my twenty year plan, but... Oh, did I tell you about my twenty year plan? Okay, well. Okay, listen here. In year one, this is the year where I'm going to take off those extra seven pounds. You know that's equal to seven pounds of butter? Heh heh heh! So it's like I'm wearin' seven pounds of butter! Ha! Eh, oh... Where was I? Oh, oh yes. So my aunt and uncle here were celebrating their twentieth anniversary. My uncle wanted to sing Sunrise, Sunset. He wanted me to sing that, and I haven't sung that since Cindy's wedding, and, well, she never thanked me for that. Well, I'm still, uh... Well, she's probably really busy and all...


K15 - Superdome - over 1 year ago
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"Show them a quarterback and all they see is a capitol asset..."
Only off by two letters.


K14 - Mighty Jack - over 1 year ago
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He looks like Frank Conniff.


K14 - Mighty Jack - over 1 year ago
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They dubbed his fingers!


K14 - Mighty Jack - over 1 year ago
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What some street performers will do to get an audience...


K10 - Cosmic Princess - over 1 year ago
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It's the gorilla his dreams.


311 - It Conquered the World - about 3 years ago
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Hey, where's the voiceover guy? Did he go to the bathroom or something?


108 - The Slime People - about 3 years ago
6 laughs

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"Did you actually see the wall?" No, I saw them on the Dark Side of the Moon tour.