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Cris Marko
In San Jose, CA
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Favorite Episodes

  1. Night of the Blood Beast
    278
  2. Deathstalker and the Warriors From Hell
    301
  3. Time Chasers
    397
  4. Hercules and the Captive Women
    138
  5. Pod People
    507
  6. Fugitive Alien
    296
  7. Riding with Death
    352
  8. Time of the Apes
    246
  9. Gamera vs. Zigra
    151
  10. Angels' Revenge
    189
  11. Boggy Creek II: And the Legend Continues
    309
  12. The Hellcats
    100

Recent Comments with recent replies

401 - Space Travelers - over 4 years ago
4 laughs

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Probably my least favorite MST3K episode, simply because this movie is so boring and dull that even the riffs can't bring it to life.


2 laughs

5 replies Comment icon
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This is one of the films that riffs itself.


303 - Pod People - about 4 years ago
3 laughs

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I'd like to meet the guy responsible for the wardrobe in this movie. I grew up during the 80s. Nobody dressed like anyone in this movie.


Paste Magazine rates 'every' episode of MST3K
Forum - 8 months ago
4 laughs

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Okay, they skip the KTMA experiments, but here's their opinion on the other 177 shows: https://www.pastemagazine.com/articles/2017/03/ranking-every-mst3k-episode-from-worst-to-best.html

Feel free to disagree!


Forum - about 1 year ago
4 laughs

8 replies Comment icon
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I think i figured out why, it's always been so easy to fall asleep watching this show whether you want to or not. Joel, Mike, and Kevin have quite soothing voices


Geteven (aka Road to Revenge)
Forum - about 1 year ago
2 laughs

4 replies Comment icon
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I've just watched this, it plumbs depths that most bad film-makers could only dream of. An ex-cop takes on a drug-dealing satanic cult. Awful acting, arthritic combat, boobs and a very drunk Wings Hauser all turn up more than once.

Our hero John de Hart, sports a moustache/mullet combo that makes Zap Rowsdower look almost respectable. He directs, stars and also sings.

You can find the whole movie on YouTube but, just for now, here's John performing his magnum opus, 'The Shimmy Slide': https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zN2UuGfGr8k

The great thing is that this is one of those sincere bad movies, not a parody. John de Hart is the Country & Western Neil Breen. You have to see it to believe it!


Let's get to know each other's bodi---er, origins
Forum - about 1 year ago
0 laughs

15 replies Comment icon
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How long have you been a MSTie? How did you find out about the show?


Who knew? RIP Ray
Forum - about 1 year ago
2 laughs

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I didn't realize Ray Dennis Steckler (aka Cash Flagg, aka the director of The Incredibly Strange Creatures) was dead. He actually passed in 2009. Here's an article about him: http://www.popmatters.com/post/68957-its-a-shame-about-ray-ray-dennis-steckler-1938-2009/


WAiT: Bad Movie Jukebox
Forum - over 1 year ago
4 laughs

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What are the worst and "best" songs of the MST movies themselves? Some movies, like Catalina Caper, actually hired professional talent like Little Richard. Other movies may have owed favors to the bands they decided to go with.
*Wednesday's Answer it Together inspired by Iguana Boy!


Rio Olympics, are you digging it?
Forum - over 1 year ago
1 laugh

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Opening night was different....thank God for that million dollar projector. The different waves of immigrants was interesting, although my friend felt that the Nazi rat lines should of been also represented. I'm a geek about folk costumes and countries I've never hear before, making me more aware of how out of touch I am with current geography. I got the app that will allow you to watch ALL the countries in all the events instead of nbc and annoying Bob Costas only showing popular sports with Americans in them. I really want to watch and understand more about events they usually won't show much of. So I'm going to binge watch more judo, shooting, hand ball, archery, speed walking, and maybe table tennis. I don't want to give any spoilers, but the prime time events are more of swimming, diving, and gymnastics which is boss. So what's your pleasure?


Anti-Polish
701 - Night of the Blood Beast - over 1 year ago
0 laughs

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Crow's ethnic slur about 50.0 is rather jarring.


Recent Riffs

1 laugh

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Where you going?! "I gotta go, they just got Barb Wire at Blockbuster!"


316 - Gamera vs. Zigra - about 2 years ago
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Now are ya happy? Next time don't call me, I'm supposed to be laying eggs this time of year!


316 - Gamera vs. Zigra - about 2 years ago
0 laughs

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Bust a move, Gamera.


316 - Gamera vs. Zigra - about 2 years ago
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Hey I don't find this funny. I got a meatball on my nose for crying out loud!


609 - The Skydivers - almost 3 years ago
0 laughs

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Release litter!


0 laughs

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He died from having a really stupid nose.


314 - Mighty Jack - over 3 years ago
2 laughs

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"Doctor? I've got this awful headache..." Ok, climb in.


109 - Project Moonbase - over 3 years ago
2 laughs

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"This time use a water balloon, that will really scare 'em."


621 - The Beast of Yucca Flats - over 3 years ago
3 laughs

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Mr. Franklin looks like he's nearing the end of his third trimester.


806 - The Undead - over 3 years ago
3 laughs

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I want to go left, stupid horse!


806 - The Undead - over 3 years ago
2 laughs

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You go and cry over there!


322 - Master Ninja I - over 3 years ago
2 laughs

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"You alright?!" Yeah, but I'm out twenty bucks. Let's head back to the magic store.