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Joseph Ewing

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Favorite Episodes

  1. Gamera vs. Zigra
    162
  2. Teenage Caveman
    141
  3. Invasion USA
    164
  4. Being from Another Planet
    180
  5. The Rebel Set
    149
  6. Gamera
    226
  7. The Deadly Bees
    203
  8. Bride of the Monster
    216
  9. Lost Continent
    231
  10. Master Ninja I
    238
  11. Attack of the the Eye Creatures
    214
  12. The Day the Earth Froze
    250
  13. Teenagers from Outer Space
    262
  14. Cave Dwellers
    403
  15. It Conquered the World
    265
  16. The Skydivers
    253
  17. Escape 2000
    239
  18. Assignment: Venezuela (the lost short)
    161
  19. Fugitive Alien
    309
  20. Gunslinger
    151
  21. War of the Colossal Beast
    207
  22. I Accuse My Parents
    378
  23. Radar Secret Service
    208
  24. The Beast of Yucca Flats
    242
  25. The Unearthly
    181
  26. The Violent Years
    158
  27. San Francisco International
    246
  28. The Creeping Terror
    235
  29. Samson Vs The Vampire Women
    264
  30. The Final Sacrifice
    713
  31. Santa Claus
    271
  32. Tormented
    210
  33. Attack of the Giant Leeches
    198
  34. Jungle Goddess
    170
  35. Pod People
    527
  36. Space Travelers
    138
  37. 12 to the Moon
    186
  38. Daddy-O
    230
  39. Rocketship X-M
    270
  40. High School Big Shot
    175
  41. Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
    280
  42. Red Zone Cuba
    218
  43. Last of the Wild Horses
    150
  44. Kitten with a Whip
    145
  45. Fire Maidens of Outer Space
    209
  46. The Amazing Colossal Man
    195
  47. The Brain that Wouldn't Die
    315
  48. Godzilla vs. the Sea Monster
    181
  49. The Undead
    227
  50. I Was a Teenage Werewolf
    182
  51. The Leech Woman
    218
  52. The Beatniks
    175

Recent Comments with recent replies

521 - Santa Claus - over 4 years ago
9 laughs

4 replies Comment icon
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How many children's Christmas movies end with police being called in?


615 - Kitten with a Whip - almost 5 years ago
5 laughs

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The pseudo-intellectual, thirty year-old college freshman, and "very holy man" with the Jay Gatsby hat is officially the most annoying character in the entire history of the show.


320 - The Unearthly - almost 5 years ago
3 laughs

5 replies Comment icon
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It's funny, considering the opening sketch, that Trace went on to work at America's Funniest Home Videos.


619 - Red Zone Cuba - over 4 years ago
0 laughs

3 replies Comment icon
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I know they had to edit movies to fit the time-slot, but it seems like they edited out scenes to purposefully make the movies more confusing. Like from jumping from the cop telling them that Coleman Francis has a 5000 dollar bounty on his head to a scene beginning with them talking about how "they" give you 1000 bucks when you join and 1000 when it's over. No matter how bad of a movie this is, you know there was some lines cut between those two conversations.


1002 - Girl in Gold Boots - about 5 years ago
5 laughs

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What was the point of the whole Critter giving Buz the come here motion at the club twice and nothing coming of it? Did that have some significance I missed?


6 laughs

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What's the deal with the guy constantly saying things twice? "There are ways. There are ways." "Around. Just looking around. "When do you go back on? When?"


304 - Gamera vs. Barugon - almost 5 years ago
6 laughs

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The people who wrote these movies really must not have cared at all. The solution is luring Barugon into water with a five inch wide diamond hanging from a helicopter because water paralyzes him and he'll drown. Sigh.


301 - Cave Dwellers - almost 5 years ago
5 laughs

3 replies Comment icon
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What was the point of the character with the beard who was introduced in the village scene and killed off ten minutes later in the snake pit. He didn't further the plot at all.


1009 - Hamlet - over 6 years ago
10 laughs

1 reply Comment icon
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Not even The Bard is safe from the rapier wit of MST3K.


210 - King Dinosaur - about 5 years ago
2 laughs

6 replies Comment icon
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How could people release hour long movies?


910 - The Final Sacrifice - about 5 years ago
2 laughs

1 reply Comment icon
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They couldn't have at least shaved Rowsdower's mustache for the flashback dream scene. He looks exactly the same. They at least cut the villain's hair to portray a passage of time.


0 laughs

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I don't get the zombie part of the title. He doesn't turn into a zombie. The movie has nothing to do with zombies. They just hypnotize him to murder people.


Recent Riffs

316 - Gamera vs. Zigra - almost 5 years ago
7 laughs

1 reply Comment icon
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It's...


2 laughs

1 reply Comment icon
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Good lord, Chicken of Crank-Whore. Is there a line in this episode that isn't one of your favorites?


421 - Monster A-Go Go - over 4 years ago
2 laughs

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Realistic Action Batch.


404 - Teenagers from Outer Space - almost 5 years ago
2 laughs

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I love how all of their fifties movies have cars galore but in this episode they suddenly decided to go with the muffled screams from the trunk gag."


404 - Teenagers from Outer Space - almost 5 years ago
4 laughs

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39:52 "Shaved her legs and then he was a she I say hey..."


319 - War of the Colossal Beast - almost 5 years ago
4 laughs

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"Sorry to be so long." Crow: "Bragger."


705 - Escape 2000 - almost 5 years ago
0 laughs

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How could this have been the sequel to something, and then have another sequel AFTER this?


404 - Teenagers from Outer Space - about 5 years ago
6 laughs

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Doo dee doo, come on. It's a nice day for a white wedding. Doo dee doo, nice day to, dee doo, start agaaain.


624 - Samson Vs The Vampire Women - about 5 years ago
6 laughs

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Tell your friends the vampires are here!