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William Johnson

Wall Posts

Favorite Episodes

  1. I Accuse My Parents
    345
  2. Zombie Nightmare
    261
  3. San Francisco International
    219
  4. Pod People
    472
  5. Catalina Caper
    227
  6. Escape 2000
    208
  7. The Starfighters
    192
  8. Warrior of the Lost World
    271
  9. Deathstalker and the Warriors From Hell
    280
  10. Girls Town
    245
  11. The Brute Man
    172
  12. Master Ninja I
    215
  13. Time of the Apes
    221
  14. Swamp Diamonds
    129
  15. Teenage Strangler
    269
  16. Eegah
    333
  17. Daddy-O
    203
  18. Code Name Diamond Head
    152
  19. Tormented
    184
  20. The Violent Years
    139
  21. The Sword and the Dragon
    187
  22. Secret Agent Super Dragon
    175
  23. The Day the Earth Froze
    227
  24. Santa Claus
    250
  25. The Girl in Lovers Lane
    193
  26. Attack of the the Eye Creatures
    190
  27. The Sinister Urge
    182
  28. The Giant Gila Monster
    200
  29. Wild Rebels
    136
  30. Teenage Crime Wave
    147
  31. Assignment: Venezuela (the lost short)
    148

Recent Comments with recent replies

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There's one moment in this movie that actually strikes me as having some genuine emotion. When the potato woman gets killed, he says, "My life wasn't worth yours." and if there had been that much sincerity in the rest of the movie, it wouldn't have been half as bad.


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610 - The Violent Years - over 3 years ago

Okay, I know it is a badly written short by in 'Young Man's Fancy', how is it that Alex(ander Phips) has no time for girls? I mean, the subtext we all read into it is that Alex and 20's-Boy are gay lovers ... fine, it makes sense in an ironic, funny way ... but this was not brilliant satire: this was a straight-up face-value short on 'time study'.

I get that Alex is busy ... but was 20s-boy just saying that because he knew his sister would slobber all over him? And, in the end, he seems to have a loooot of time for girls ('double bag it son) so I never knew where that whole concept came from.


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101 - The Crawling Eye - almost 3 years ago

I'm starting from the beginning. I've watched MST3K since 1990 ... but I've never actually sat down and watched it from beginning to end. So, seeing that I was sick, I said 'what a time to start'. I'm going to view these as if looking at them for the first time.

The movie: Not a bad concept for '50s fare but the incredibly poor production value really drags it down.

The riffs: This one is pretty dull until the monsters show up ... and then Joel and the Bots are on fire, especially with the 'eye' puns.

Host Segments: Looking at it as if I didn't know what it will become, kind of dopey but endearing.

Overall: **1/2 out of ****


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514 - Teenage Strangler - almost 4 years ago

I don't think any of the couples they mentioned after the "Is this Love?" short are actually still together.


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610 - The Violent Years - over 3 years ago

This one doesn't seem to get the love on here it deserves! One of the best shorts they ever did and the movie is a classic (in the MST3K sense).


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422 - The Day the Earth Froze - over 3 years ago

Sorry to go a bit out there but besides MST3K one of my great loves in life is metal. The music, not the material.

Anyway, there is a Finnish metal band (I'd say the genre is slightly power, mostly melodic death) called Amorphis that has focused, in recent releases, on the Finish epic poem Kalevala, which I believe some or all of the Finnish fantasy movies MST3K did are based on as well (though I could be wrong).

Naturally, the opening song on their album entitled Skyforger is 'Sampo'. I'll post the link below.

If you like heavy music, Amorphis is great especially when they changed directions with their most recent lead singer and did the kind of grandiose storytelling you see in the films on MST3K.

Ensiferum is another good Finnish heavy metal band as well.


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612 - The Starfighters - almost 3 years ago

I asked my best friend's dad, a retired Lt. Colonel in the Air Force, about the Starfighters and he said they sucked.

I read up on them as well. One website (not sure which one so I can't give credit) said pilots nicknamed the starfighter planes the 'Widowmakers' because of crashes/deaths/etc.


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507 - I Accuse My Parents - over 3 years ago

"You'll have to go to church with me every Sunday"

"FOR -- GET IT"


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1001 - Soultaker - almost 3 years ago

We are going to rock (especially at 1:31)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O-sDf0CED_Q


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Forum - almost 3 years ago

Does anybody else watch film critics for fun?


Alright weekend skeleton crew...
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Forum - almost 3 years ago

What's a movie that got panned that you liked. (Have we done this before?)
I liked Waterworld. ::holds out arms for cathartic hugs. Instead is pelted to death with shoes::


Recent Riffs

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So the main cause of accidents is joy, sex and old age?


7 laughs

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It was a good idea to film the walk-through.


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101 - The Crawling Eye - almost 3 years ago

That must be his overnight gun.


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Must ... finish ... Biography on ... Loretta ... Swit.


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607 - Bloodlust - over 3 years ago

Sis takes to the comfort of cream items.


6 laughs

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607 - Bloodlust - over 3 years ago

"Cows are a lot like people"

Servo: They're sinners.


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507 - I Accuse My Parents - over 3 years ago

We invited the cast of Gigi over!


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Swimming!


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622 - Angels' Revenge - over 3 years ago

HOW ABOUT YOU SHINE MY STEAK OVER HERE!


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612 - The Starfighters - over 3 years ago

Uh ... excuse me *ahem* blow bebe blow


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610 - The Violent Years - over 3 years ago

Penthouse Forum: The Motion Picture


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608 - Code Name Diamond Head - over 3 years ago

Ew, he's got a Jackie Mason body