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William Johnson

Wall Posts

Favorite Episodes

  1. I Accuse My Parents
    353
  2. Zombie Nightmare
    267
  3. San Francisco International
    225
  4. Pod People
    485
  5. Catalina Caper
    233
  6. Escape 2000
    216
  7. The Starfighters
    202
  8. Warrior of the Lost World
    282
  9. Deathstalker and the Warriors From Hell
    290
  10. Girls Town
    251
  11. The Brute Man
    180
  12. Master Ninja I
    221
  13. Time of the Apes
    230
  14. Swamp Diamonds
    133
  15. Teenage Strangler
    275
  16. Eegah
    341
  17. Daddy-O
    211
  18. Code Name Diamond Head
    158
  19. Tormented
    188
  20. The Violent Years
    140
  21. The Sword and the Dragon
    190
  22. Secret Agent Super Dragon
    185
  23. The Day the Earth Froze
    230
  24. Santa Claus
    254
  25. The Girl in Lovers Lane
    194
  26. Attack of the the Eye Creatures
    195
  27. The Sinister Urge
    187
  28. The Giant Gila Monster
    206
  29. Wild Rebels
    138
  30. Teenage Crime Wave
    151
  31. Assignment: Venezuela (the lost short)
    151

Recent Comments with recent replies

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There's one moment in this movie that actually strikes me as having some genuine emotion. When the potato woman gets killed, he says, "My life wasn't worth yours." and if there had been that much sincerity in the rest of the movie, it wouldn't have been half as bad.


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610 - The Violent Years - over 3 years ago

Okay, I know it is a badly written short by in 'Young Man's Fancy', how is it that Alex(ander Phips) has no time for girls? I mean, the subtext we all read into it is that Alex and 20's-Boy are gay lovers ... fine, it makes sense in an ironic, funny way ... but this was not brilliant satire: this was a straight-up face-value short on 'time study'.

I get that Alex is busy ... but was 20s-boy just saying that because he knew his sister would slobber all over him? And, in the end, he seems to have a loooot of time for girls ('double bag it son) so I never knew where that whole concept came from.


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101 - The Crawling Eye - about 3 years ago

I'm starting from the beginning. I've watched MST3K since 1990 ... but I've never actually sat down and watched it from beginning to end. So, seeing that I was sick, I said 'what a time to start'. I'm going to view these as if looking at them for the first time.

The movie: Not a bad concept for '50s fare but the incredibly poor production value really drags it down.

The riffs: This one is pretty dull until the monsters show up ... and then Joel and the Bots are on fire, especially with the 'eye' puns.

Host Segments: Looking at it as if I didn't know what it will become, kind of dopey but endearing.

Overall: **1/2 out of ****


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514 - Teenage Strangler - about 4 years ago

I don't think any of the couples they mentioned after the "Is this Love?" short are actually still together.


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610 - The Violent Years - almost 4 years ago

This one doesn't seem to get the love on here it deserves! One of the best shorts they ever did and the movie is a classic (in the MST3K sense).


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422 - The Day the Earth Froze - almost 4 years ago

Sorry to go a bit out there but besides MST3K one of my great loves in life is metal. The music, not the material.

Anyway, there is a Finnish metal band (I'd say the genre is slightly power, mostly melodic death) called Amorphis that has focused, in recent releases, on the Finish epic poem Kalevala, which I believe some or all of the Finnish fantasy movies MST3K did are based on as well (though I could be wrong).

Naturally, the opening song on their album entitled Skyforger is 'Sampo'. I'll post the link below.

If you like heavy music, Amorphis is great especially when they changed directions with their most recent lead singer and did the kind of grandiose storytelling you see in the films on MST3K.

Ensiferum is another good Finnish heavy metal band as well.


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612 - The Starfighters - about 3 years ago

I asked my best friend's dad, a retired Lt. Colonel in the Air Force, about the Starfighters and he said they sucked.

I read up on them as well. One website (not sure which one so I can't give credit) said pilots nicknamed the starfighter planes the 'Widowmakers' because of crashes/deaths/etc.


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507 - I Accuse My Parents - almost 4 years ago

"You'll have to go to church with me every Sunday"

"FOR -- GET IT"


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1001 - Soultaker - about 3 years ago

We are going to rock (especially at 1:31)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O-sDf0CED_Q


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Forum - almost 3 years ago

Does anybody else watch film critics for fun?


Alright weekend skeleton crew...
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Forum - almost 3 years ago

What's a movie that got panned that you liked. (Have we done this before?)
I liked Waterworld. ::holds out arms for cathartic hugs. Instead is pelted to death with shoes::


Recent Riffs

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623 - The Amazing Transparent Man - almost 4 years ago

So the main cause of accidents is joy, sex and old age?


7 laughs

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It was a good idea to film the walk-through.


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101 - The Crawling Eye - about 3 years ago

That must be his overnight gun.


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Must ... finish ... Biography on ... Loretta ... Swit.


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607 - Bloodlust - almost 4 years ago

Sis takes to the comfort of cream items.


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607 - Bloodlust - almost 4 years ago

"Cows are a lot like people"

Servo: They're sinners.


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507 - I Accuse My Parents - almost 4 years ago

We invited the cast of Gigi over!


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Swimming!


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622 - Angels' Revenge - almost 4 years ago

HOW ABOUT YOU SHINE MY STEAK OVER HERE!


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612 - The Starfighters - almost 4 years ago

Uh ... excuse me *ahem* blow bebe blow


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610 - The Violent Years - almost 4 years ago

Penthouse Forum: The Motion Picture


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608 - Code Name Diamond Head - almost 4 years ago

Ew, he's got a Jackie Mason body