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Teri Gee
In Glorious Idaho!

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Phantom Chicken of Crank Whore - about 2 years ago
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Looks like you thoroughly enjoyed yourself Teri..That's way cool!
BTW I know you saw some of the posts relating to my name and stuff but just to make sure you know I'll probably use this Club Name quite a bit..still a good friend just with a new/old name...


Teri Gee - about 2 years ago
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And finally, Starwolf #3: World of the Starwolves

This story opens with Dilullo, not Chane (unlike the previous two stories). He's in Brindisi, where he had lived with his family before the house fire that killed his wife and daughter. (Again, not from a Starwolf raid.) Ostensibly, he's retired and preparing to build a beautiful villa from the money he made on the last mission getting Randall Ashton from the Closed Worlds. In reality, he's not doing much at all with his time.

Chane finds him in his retirement and entices him to join him to retrieve the Singing Suns (40 synthetic jewels created a long time ago and never able to be duplicated since). Achernar, the planet who owned them, was offering a huge reward to anyone who could bring them back. Dilullo is skeptical about the mission, but he agrees after looking at the site where his family died and realizing that he's trying to live in the past. He warns Chane about trying to do that and then joins the crew, along with Bollard again and some others who haven't been involved before.

Their first stop is in the worlds of the Dark Spiral (or Argo Spur) where Varna and its allied worlds are. All the planets there traffic in the stolen loot from the Starwolves. They get protection and money and the Starwolves also get protection from the other worlds. Chane's plan is for them to pose as traders in valuable ores to get a meeting with an important trader on the planet of Mruun. He and Dilullo go alone to the meeting because the trader knows Chane well, having dealt with him before as a Starwolf. Chane uses a device on the trader to force him to tell who has the Singing Suns (the set had been split up and sold to about 10 other merchants) and then they hightail it out of there. On their way back to the ship, with guards in pursuit, they run into a group of Paragarans (dog-like humanoids who are large and very strong). The pursuit turns into a brawl and Dilullo and Chane save one of the Paragarans who had been knocked out. Gwaath, the Paragaran says that he'll tag along with them until they get to a place where he can catch a ship headed back to Paragara.

Their next stop is the first merchant who bought some of the Singing Suns, Eron of Rith. What they find when they arrive is that Eron not only knew they were coming but he has news for them: the Singing Suns were actually all purchased by a hidden people called the Qajars who live amongst the Lethal Worlds (dead planets mined to explode during an invasion). All the Qajars want is to have the most beautiful things in the galaxy and stare at them. To protect themselves, their existence is mysterious and they have developed fierce weaponry designed to cause pain as well as to kill. Eron makes a deal with them that he'll help them get to Chlann (the Qajar home planet) and they'll have to split the reward with him. They agree and head off.

The attempt is a miserable failure. They almost die before getting even close to Chlann. The Qajars use one of their weapons and Dilullo very nearly is killed by it. Gwaath and Chane are also drastically affected but they manage to limp back to Rith. At Rith, Eron threatens them and essentially takes them prisoner while he makes sure that the Qajars won't blame him for the invasion. In the meantime, Bollard blames Chane for nearly getting Dilullo killed and for ruining everything. For the first time, Chane feels a pang of conscience. He owes a debt to Dilullo for saving his life and he can't wait and hope things will work out. So in the night, he sneaks out and heads to the one group who has a chance of taking out the Qajars: the Starwolves of Varna.

He throws caution to the winds and makes a direct flight there. Once he lands, he runs into his father's only friend (Berkt) who takes him home. While there, Chane tells his plan and gets Berkt's support in proposing his plan to the Varnan Council. Meanwhile, the clan of Ssander is determined to see Chane dead but they can't while he has protection. So he wanders around Varna and ends up at the home of his parents. He even realizes that he's much like Dilullo: he's come to a vacant lot to stare at what he lost. He also sees Graal, a beautiful Varnan woman who has teased him many times but doesn't hate him or despise him. She is surprised that he's back, but she's not much worried one way or the other. She likes to have fun and isn't ready to be tied down to anyone.

He manages to convince the Council to mount the attack, but one of Ssander's clan, Harkaan, will be leading it and Chane will be his pilot. Chane agrees, but asks for one concession: that he be allowed to choose one treasure for himself. Just one and nothing else. (He plans to take the Singing Suns but he hasn't told anyone that they're on Chlann.) They agree and the Starwolves depart. The attack on Chlann is a success and Chane claims the Singing Suns as his treasure, but Harkaan has been watching him and decides to kill him to get his vengeance right then and there, even though Chane is still under Council protection. Chane, in a nod to Dilullo's code, knocks him out instead of killing him and flees Chlann in Harkaan's own ship. He's forced to hide from the Starwolves for days before it's safe to leave.

He returns to Rith and makes a new bargain with Eron. Then, when all is said and done, Dilullo picks him up from Rith and they leave again. The last lines of the book are as follows:

Then, he added, "The devil with all this nostalgia. A starman's home is space. Let's go."
They went.

The end. :)


Teri Gee - about 2 years ago
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Review of Starwolf #2: The Closed Worlds

In this one, we get a little more of a look into who Chane is and how he approaches life, i.e. the Starwolf mindset. He doesn't want to die and he works hard to keep the deal between him and Dilullo going, but at the same time, if he has to face death, it will be proudly without cringing. Better to risk everything for a chance to get out alive than to be cautious and die. Many times, Dilullo says that Chane is still mostly a Starwolf and not really human because of how he grew up. Chane never takes that as an insult, but always a compliment.

The adventure in this story is a mission to the Closed Worlds, a system that eschews all space travel and doesn't look kindly on people dropping by. A very wealthy merchant (James Ashton) is looking for his brother who went there on an expedition to discover some big secret that an old Merc told him existed in the Closed Worlds. But the brother (Randall Ashton) has gone missing and James just wants to know what's happened to him and to get him back if possible. He offers a very large payment if they can do it. Dilullo accepts and gets a crew together, but he sends Chane out of town while he gets the crew because he doesn't trust Chane not to screw things up like he almost did the last time.

So Chane goes to Wales, his parents' homeland. He fudges things a little bit as he talks to people so that no one realizes he was born on Varna. He runs into some Welsh men about his age who are a bit rough with him and he has to remind himself not to go overboard, but in the end, he buys them drinks and they teach him Welsh battle songs which he loves. When Dilullo calls him back, Chane sings some of the songs to him and Dilullo is not impressed, but for Chane, this was a connection to Earth and he wants to return to Wales someday.

Off they go to the Closed Worlds. When they arrive, they are nearly killed by the people of Arkuu (the main planet in the Closed Worlds region) and have to flee, but they come back again because Chane saw a signal from the city. They break into the city by night, rescue an Arkuun woman (Vreya) who had been arrested for wanting to open the Closed Worlds to space travel. They also find one of the members of Ashton's party (Garcia) who tells them that Ashton and a few others escaped but he stayed behind with another member of the expedition who had been injured and later died. They head off into the jungles of Arkuu to try to track down where Ashton went. He was seeking something called the Free-Faring which supposedly transported people around the universe in the blink of an eye.

As they search, they run into a species called the Nanes, strange manmade beings who are almost immortal and aren't shy about trying to kill (and eat) those who come into their territory. Even Chane is nearly overpowered by them when they first attack. He gets angry at being overwhelmed and that helps him escape.

They zero in on a mountain with a strange radiation emanating from it. This is the Free-Faring. When they get inside, they discover just what the Free-Faring actually is. It was invented by the Arkuuns long ago as a way to explore without leaving the planet. The mind is separated from the body and can go anywhere. But it became almost like a drug to the Arkuuns and it almost destroyed their civilization. So they destroyed as many of the Free-Faring machines as possible, but this was one they missed. When Dilullo, Chane, Vreya and Bollard arrive (with a few others in tow), Ashton and two others are in the Free-Faring. Their bodies cannot be removed while their minds travel. Otherwise, they die. They have to wait until they return. McGoun, the Merc who started it all, went once and hated it, but he hasn't been able to leave because the others keep coming out and then going back in again.

With the Arkuuns outside, ready to kill them and hoping to destroy the last Free-Faring, the Mercs are trapped inside. They have to figure out a plan. During the night, while the others are sleeping, Vreya sneaks over to the Free-Faring, wanting to experience that freedom. Chane sees her and tries to stop her, but the result is that they both go into the Free-Faring. Chane hates it. He feels lost while, for Vreya, it is like a drug. She leaves him behind and for a while, he tries to pursue her to bring her back, but then, he suddenly thinks of going to Varna. And he's there. His mind flits around Varna and, at first, he thinks it's quite the game that he got back without them knowing, but then, he feels like a ghost and he wants nothing more than to get back to reality again. He gets Vreya and convinces her to find the others and bring them out as well so that they can fight against the Arkuuns who want to destroy the Free-Faring. She believes him and he gets back.

He has been weakened by what happened and then Dilullo gets him off and the others eventually come back as well. They have to fight to get them off the Free-Faring, but they do it. One of the other Open World people, Raul, realizes what it almost did to them and he says that it should be destroyed. Vreya disagrees, even after nearly being lost in it. Ashton doesn't want to leave and they have to force him out. They fight their way down the mountain and a few are lost, including Raul, but they manage to get away. Chane almost is killed himself, but Dilullo saves him. However, one of the Arkuun leaders (Helmer) has destroyed their flier and the ship that Ashton came in. So they have to walk to the rendezvous, but it's through Nanes territory. They finally get to the river and build a raft which carries them, unfortunately, through the Nanes city. They're nearly overwhelmed by the Nanes, but manage to get through.

Finally, they reach the rendezvous and are prepared to return to Earth with Ashton in tow. Vreya stays with the idea of going back to the Free-Faring and trying to find a way to use it without becoming enslaved by it.

Dilullo and Chane have a last chat in private and Dilullo asks him where he went when he was in the Free-Faring. Chane admits that he went back to Varna. Dilullo commiserates with him about the feeling of homesickness and Chane declares that he'll go back to Varna again.


Teri Gee - about 2 years ago
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Review of Starwolf #1: The Weapon from Beyond

As mentioned, this is the first story and where we meet Morgan Chane and John Dilullo. Dilullo's reluctant deal with Chane stems from his general desire to avoid lethal force. Chane is dismissive of him until he realizes just how strong Dilullo actually is. Over and over through the series, Chane thinks to himself that Dilullo (and the Mercs in general) are not as strong as the Starwolves because they can't be, but they're impressive anyway.

John Dilullo doesn't own the ship he commands. He charters a new one every time he goes on a new mission and his crew changes as well. The exception is Bollard, who is fat and looks very soft and stupid, but is extremely strong and clever when he wants to be. Bollard and Dilullo have worked together a number of times. Dilullo's crew isn't very excited to have another crew member and they're suspicious of him (but no killing with a forklift at any point). In fact, no one ever finds out that he's a Starwolf among the Mercs. A few others figure it out, but not the Mercs. Starwolves are universally hated. A lone Starwolf would be dead in seconds if he revealed himself, which is why Chane keeps it a secret, even though he chafes at having to do so. He doesn't want to be human. He wants to be a Starwolf, but he can't be. A Merc is second best.

Dilullo is hired by the planet Kharal to find out what new secret weapon the planet Vhol has discovered in a dusty part of the galaxy that is difficult to navigate. The Kharalis want the weapon destroyed to remove the Vhollans advantage, especially because they're trying to conquer Kharal. During the negotiations with Kharal, Chane goes off on his own (much like in Fugitive Alien) and gets attacked by the Kharalis. He doesn't start anything, but in the fight, because he's so much stronger, he breaks both arms of his attacker. He's put in prison and contacted by Dilullo via secret radio. This should all sound pretty familiar. :)

In order to get to Vhol, Chane breaks out of the Kharali jail with a young Vhollan officer named Yorolin (Yep, we're number one.). After scaling a city wall replete with gargoyles, they get on board and take off. On Vhol, Chane ends up spending time with Yorolin at his family estate because, ostensibly, Yorolin is that grateful. They go out drinking and Chane finds out that Yorolin is also trying to figure out if Chane and Dilullo are on the the up and up. Chane foils his plan and spends some time with a pretty Vhollan girl before getting sent on a difficult assignment by Dilullo (due to his going off ship on Kharal). He breaks into a warehouse and finds three strange objects that do not belong to Vhol and are so strange that they surmise they're actually from another galaxy all together. With this information in hand, they escape from Vhol and head for the hidden planet.

On their way, the Starwolves catch up with them. They're still trying to find Chane and kill him, but only Chane and Dilullo know that part. They barely manage to avoid them because a Vhollan cruiser comes into play, trying to take out the Merc ship. The Mercs get away, leaving the Starwolves attacking the cruiser and they land on the planet. This is where things get truly weird. They find a ship on the planet that crashed millennia ago. It is from a different galaxy, and the people who piloted it are still on the ship in some kind of stasis waiting to be rescued. The Vhollan scientist in charge of analyzing the stuff on the ship has found that there are no offensive weapons on board. Only mineral samples and defensive weapons. These are not aggressive conquerors, just explorers. The Vhollan cruiser arrives at the planet but can’t destroy the Merc ship because it’s too close to their prize. Then, suddenly, the rescue ship for the ship’s crew arrives and everyone is forced to evacuate while they wake up the crew and then leave. They destroy the crashed ship and the Mercs are forced to make a run for it to escape the Vhollans and get back to Kharal. They do and get their pay. ...and it ends with Dilullo reluctantly taking Chane with him back to Earth.

Parts 2 and 3 to come.


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On a similar note, I hope my comment on the home ec thread last week came across okay. I didn't mean to stir things up in a thread you'd walked away from, but I did think you'd made good points. (And, since it can be hard to tell on the Internet, my compliments about enjoying your contributions to the site were meant at face value.)


Joseph Charles - over 3 years ago
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Hey, Teri, I just now read your reply to my comments on the short about encouraging women to study physics—you made some excellent points. I had too narrow a view on the whole thing and you put it in a better context, a more historical context. Thank you & kudos! See you on the SOL!


Favorite Episodes

  1. Werewolf
    525
  2. Moon Zero Two
    199
  3. Fugitive Alien
    327
  4. Star Force: Fugitive Alien II
    252
  5. The Deadly Bees
    214
  6. Hercules Against the Moon Men
    215
  7. The Beast of Yucca Flats
    253
  8. The Magic Voyage of Sinbad
    218
  9. The Day the Earth Froze
    276
  10. The Final Sacrifice
    744
  11. Radar Secret Service
    222
  12. Prince of Space
    453
  13. The Killer Shrews
    252
  14. Hamlet
    175
  15. Track of the Moon Beast
    278
  16. Beginning of the End
    262
  17. Secret Agent Super Dragon
    214
  18. The Screaming Skull
    269
  19. The Dead Talk Back
    278
  20. Blood Waters of Dr. Z
    206
  21. Danger! Death Ray
    466
  22. Puma Man
    509
  23. Girl in Gold Boots
    274
  24. It Conquered the World
    286
  25. Gamera vs. Barugon
    174
  26. Gamera vs. Gaos
    149
  27. Wild Rebels
    166
  28. Lost Continent
    244
  29. The Crawling Eye
    259
  30. The Giant Gila Monster
    254
  31. Hercules and the Captive Women
    157
  32. Fire Maidens of Outer Space
    223
  33. Crash of the Moons
    171
  34. Bride of the Monster
    233
  35. Colossus and the Headhunters
    180
  36. Hercules
    152
  37. Swamp Diamonds
    152
  38. Racket Girls
    170
  39. Operation Double 007
    233
  40. Teenage Strangler
    309
  41. 12 to the Moon
    202
  42. The Creeping Terror
    246
  43. Code Name Diamond Head
    183
  44. Horror of Party Beach
    308
  45. Space Mutiny
    887
  46. The Projected Man
    203
  47. The Space Children
    177
  48. Gorgo
    171
  49. Devil Fish
    253
  50. Future War
    261
  51. Squirm
    235
  52. The Million Eyes of Sumuru
    30
  53. The Hellcats
    113
  54. Monster A-Go Go
    338
  55. Last of the Wild Horses
    160
  56. Godzilla vs. the Sea Monster
    198
  57. The Sword and the Dragon
    220
  58. Cave Dwellers
    430
  59. Mighty Jack
    172
  60. Teenage Caveman
    155
  61. Gamera vs. Zigra
    171
  62. Hercules Unchained
    181
  63. Riding with Death
    386
  64. Master Ninja II
    156
  65. The Skydivers
    270
  66. Ring of Terror
    190
  67. The Brain that Wouldn't Die
    336
  68. Being from Another Planet
    195
  69. The Indestructible Man
    157
  70. The Magic Sword
    205
  71. Manos: The Hands of Fate
    677
  72. Manhunt in Space
    168
  73. Eegah
    386
  74. Mitchell
    574
  75. Final Justice
    260
  76. Red Zone Cuba
    225
  77. The Amazing Transparent Man
    141
  78. Assignment: Venezuela (the lost short)
    170
  79. Revenge of the Creature
    223
  80. The Deadly Mantis
    212
  81. The Incredibly Strange Creatures...
    279
  82. Jack Frost
    329
  83. Robot Holocaust
    156
  84. Catalina Caper
    266
  85. King Dinosaur
    202
  86. Godzilla vs. Megalon
    308
  87. Gamera
    242
  88. Gamera vs. Guiron
    247
  89. Earth vs. the Spider
    199
  90. The Viking Women and the Sea Serpent
    224
  91. The Castle of Fu Manchu
    150
  92. Attack of the the Eye Creatures
    227
  93. Gunslinger
    161
  94. Alien from L.A.
    275
  95. The Atomic Brain
    169
  96. Outlaw of Gor
    313
  97. San Francisco International
    262
  98. Zombie Nightmare
    300
  99. Bloodlust
    185
  100. The Starfighters
    234
  101. Samson Vs The Vampire Women
    275
  102. Night of the Blood Beast
    310
  103. The Brute Man
    214
  104. Deathstalker and the Warriors From Hell
    331
  105. The Incredible Melting Man
    272
  106. Laserblast
    390
  107. The Undead
    239
  108. Terror from the Year 5000
    242
  109. The Giant Spider Invasion
    339
  110. Time Chasers
    429
  111. Overdrawn at the Memory Bank
    415
  112. Boggy Creek II: And the Legend Continues
    337
  113. Invasion of the Neptune Men
    240
  114. It Lives by Night
    171
  115. Diabolik
    208
  116. Superdome
    44
  117. Legend of the Dinosaurs
    47
  118. The Robot vs. the Aztec Mummy
    206
  119. Master Ninja I
    253
  120. The Corpse Vanishes
    152
  121. The Crawling Hand
    161
  122. The Black Scorpion
    123
  123. Rocketship X-M
    280
  124. Daddy-O
    248
  125. The Unearthly
    200
  126. Santa Claus
    289
  127. Attack of the Giant Leeches
    215
  128. Teenage Crime Wave
    181
  129. The Thing That Couldn't Die
    195
  130. Agent for H.A.R.M.
    257
  131. Robot Monster
    153
  132. The Slime People
    124
  133. Teenagers from Outer Space
    279
  134. I Accuse My Parents
    403
  135. The Human Duplicators
    206
  136. The Phantom Planet
    217
  137. Gamera vs. Barugon
    52
  138. Reptilicus
    31
  139. The Time Travelers
    18
  140. The Beast of Hollow Mountain
    23
  141. Starcrash
    36
  142. The Land that Time Forgot
    21
  143. Yongary
    21
  144. Wizards of the Lost Kingdom
    27
  145. At the Earth's Core
    18
  146. Avalanche
    38

Recent Comments with recent replies

113 - The Black Scorpion - over 3 years ago
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10:34 The Professor says, "Some of my countrymen may like rattlesnakes in the house. I can do without them." Wow... not overly racist, is it? Would it have set production THAT FAR behind to at least ask ONE Mexican person if ANY of them at all like rattlesnakes in their houses? ¡Háy Chihuahua! :-)


106 - The Crawling Hand - over 3 years ago
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53:59 Better get to work on those o-rings.

A Challenger joke, Tom? Really?


6 laughs

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"I forgot to sacrifice to Neptune!" Uh, sure. Because that's what Arabs and Russians are known for. Sacrificing to the Greek gods.


108 - The Slime People - almost 2 years ago
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Tolliver gets left just outside the door and they don't even bother checking on him. There's no chance he could have survived. Five minutes later, Bonnie disappears and they know she's alive because of course the slime people would kidnap her to draw the rest of them out.

In other news, salt water dissolves the fog wall, but at no point during the war did human blood have any noticeable effect.


1008 - Final Justice - over 3 years ago
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This movie is "Welcome to the 'Merican way of doing things!"


910 - The Final Sacrifice - 8 months ago
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Absolutely perfect ep. I think it's a mighty big coincidence that the day after Troy finds map the cult comes looking for him. Also Grandma just happens to have to go to work? I don't think so. Also, why did the henchmen not help Satoris in fight against Zap? And in the end, didn't Satoris get what he was hoping for, ohter than being butt-shot and bursting in flames?


105 - The Corpse Vanishes - 11 months ago
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I just finished watching the Rifftrax of Voodoo Man this morning, and it strikes me that this episode has a very similar plot (and a similar ending). Women being abducted for the purpose of preserving his wife's youth and beauty. In Voodoo Man, he's trying to bring his wife back to life. But it's Bela Lugosi both times, too.


405 - Being from Another Planet - almost 2 years ago
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This is one of, if not the worst movie ever viewed on the SOL. It was entirely lit by two flashlights, someone obviously used a blender to edit it, but the tall blonde graduate student, Suzy, could barely open a door, had real trouble operating an elevator, and completely failed at the complex task of removing a bangle bracelet. Sheesh! Also, closing credits....Assistant Director:
Skip Schoolnik ??? Come on !!!!


Forum - 2 months ago
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I've watched 4 eps from S1 (Moon Zero Two, Robot Monster and Holocaust, and Crawling Eye) and I have to admit I've been pleasantly surprised how much I've enjoyed all 4 of them after some reviews I've read. Nothing classic but I either enjoyed the movie or the riffing or some of both. I was wondering if I've already watched the best S1 has to offer or is there one or two that you feel are on par or better than the ones I've watched.


NO NCNL XIX
Forum - 2 months ago
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Well you lot have been commenting and laighing despite my very clearly spelled out rules. So no NCNL for you this week. NOOOO! [Folds arms and stamps off in a huff then trips over pet hamster and falls flat on face].


Best beginner episodes?
Forum - 2 months ago
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So, I'm going off to college in a few weeks (I leave for band camp on August 18th), and I'm hoping to introduce some people at college to MST3K. Ya know, doin' the duty of a MSTie and stuff. It's all in a day's work! But, I always have trouble choosing a first episode. What do you guys think is the best beginner episode, or some of the most relatable, funniest episodes that can relate to many people? I always like to show Manos, Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, or Hobgoblins. Are those bad choices?


R.I.P. Rutger Hauer
Forum - 2 months ago
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"I've seen things you people wouldn't believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate. All those moments will be lost in time, like tears in rain. Time to die."


Recent Riffs

819 - Invasion of the Neptune Men - about 2 years ago
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Origami! That's Japanese, right? I like that. Well, maybe like is too strong a word. I don't mind it. Actually, I hate it. Folding paper. Stupid! Stupid!


1106 - Starcrash - over 1 year ago
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"Just a few more radians."
Yeah. Radians. You know, ten radios make a radian. Ten radians make a radius, which means we're probably walking in a circle!


816 - Prince of Space - 2 months ago
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"Manicotta, what's the matter?"
THIS! THIS IS THE MATTER!


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*mouse runs across the mantle*
Eek.


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They keep the vase nice and polished.


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I'm pretty sure this is a shot intended to convey something.


604 - Zombie Nightmare - 4 months ago
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He's doing the Nestea plunge! ...the Nestea thud.


512 - Mitchell - 4 months ago
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Excuse me. May I cut in? May I have this chase?


316 - Gamera vs. Zigra - 6 months ago
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It's like surrendering to Kukla.


316 - Gamera vs. Zigra - 6 months ago
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Hey, it's Handel's Out-of-Water-Music.


101 - The Crawling Eye - 7 months ago
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Now, go out and do something irrational!


1013 - Diabolik - 7 months ago
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That's right. Be old!