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Joseph Charles
In the not-too-distant future
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Favorite Episodes

  1. Pod People
    535
  2. The Creeping Terror
    238
  3. Attack of the Giant Leeches
    204
  4. The Beast of Yucca Flats
    245
  5. Manos: The Hands of Fate
    652
  6. Boggy Creek II: And the Legend Continues
    326
  7. Bloodlust
    176
  8. Colossus and the Headhunters
    170
  9. 12 to the Moon
    193
  10. The Skydivers
    260
  11. Mighty Jack
    162
  12. Tormented
    215
  13. The Leech Woman
    222
  14. Gamera vs. Guiron
    236
  15. Mitchell
    555
  16. The Killer Shrews
    243
  17. The Dead Talk Back
    273
  18. Puma Man
    495
  19. Warrior of the Lost World
    312
  20. Eegah
    370
  21. Monster A-Go Go
    326
  22. Attack of the the Eye Creatures
    218
  23. Teenagers from Outer Space
    269
  24. Gamera
    228
  25. Star Force: Fugitive Alien II
    242
  26. Bride of the Monster
    222
  27. The Atomic Brain
    161
  28. Alien from L.A.
    261
  29. Radar Secret Service
    210
  30. The Human Duplicators
    197
  31. Crash of the Moons
    162
  32. Manhunt in Space
    158
  33. Operation Double 007
    223
  34. War of the Colossal Beast
    211
  35. I Accuse My Parents
    389
  36. Secret Agent Super Dragon
    209
  37. It Conquered the World
    270
  38. The Girl in Lovers Lane
    213
  39. Space Travelers
    144
  40. Rocketship X-M
    271
  41. The Giant Gila Monster
    238
  42. Being from Another Planet
    186
  43. Swamp Diamonds
    146
  44. Stranded in Space
    123
  45. The Amazing Colossal Man
    199
  46. The Viking Women and the Sea Serpent
    216
  47. The Unearthly
    188
  48. Fire Maidens of Outer Space
    212
  49. King Dinosaur
    191
  50. Godzilla vs. Megalon
    291
  51. First Spaceship on Venus
    147
  52. Ring of Terror
    184
  53. Fugitive Alien
    313
  54. Lost Continent
    233
  55. Jungle Goddess
    178
  56. Godzilla vs. the Sea Monster
    184
  57. Lassie: The Painted Hills
    146
  58. Rocket Attack USA
    143
  59. Cave Dwellers
    413
  60. Gamera vs. Barugon
    164
  61. Master Ninja I
    243
  62. Earth vs. the Spider
    188
  63. Gamera vs. Zigra
    164
  64. The Incredible Melting Man
    264
  65. Last of the Wild Horses
    154
  66. The Crawling Eye
    249
  67. The Castle of Fu Manchu
    144
  68. Pilot - The Green Slime
    62
  69. The Day the Earth Froze
    259
  70. The Indestructible Man
    150
  71. Robot Holocaust
    145
  72. Teenage Caveman
    147
  73. Moon Zero Two
    185
  74. The Corpse Vanishes
    143
  75. The Crawling Hand
    150
  76. Women of the Prehistoric Planet
    161
  77. Robot Monster
    145
  78. The Mad Monster
    133
  79. Time of the Apes
    257
  80. Hercules Against the Moon Men
    202
  81. Gunslinger
    156
  82. Hercules Unchained
    174
  83. Gorgo
    162
  84. Santa Claus Conquers the Martians
    284
  85. The Starfighters
    224
  86. Night of the Blood Beast
    300
  87. Mighty Jack
    29
  88. Riding with Death
    379
  89. Blood Waters of Dr. Z
    200
  90. Devil Fish
    241
  91. Horror of Party Beach
    301
  92. The Giant Spider Invasion
    328

Recent Comments with recent replies

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“For the budget honeymooner, try Frank's Discount Falls.”

I'm not sure which is funnier—the tiny brook or the phrase “budget honeymooner.”


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A part of me wants to have a kid and a dog so one morning I can take the dog to a neighbor’s house, hide the food and water dishes and any chew toys, and when the kid wakes up, try to convince them that the dog isn't missing, that we don't have a dog, that we never had a dog.


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All the sodium has to be shipped in from New York City? Where would these monster movies be if the characters had access to Amazon?

They'd be shorter, I guess.


911 - Devil Fish - 8 months ago
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I finally watched this movie in its original form. I was hoping it was more coherent than the edited version here. Some things I noticed:

• the original movie, or at least the version I found (called “Monster Shark”), is only slightly more...watchable? The scenes are not quite as clumsily disjointed as they are in the MST edit
• the music, acting and effects are still terrible
• the original movie has considerable nudity and is more violent—it contains a rather uncomfortable sequence (which is drastically shortened here) in which the woman wearing the short, silk teddy, has that teddy ripped off before she is strangled and put in a bathtub along with her hairdryer to make it look like suicide. Yes, because when I go to see a movie about a killer shark, there had better be lots of human-on-human murdering


311 - It Conquered the World - about 3 years ago
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No matter how many times I see this episode, I don't understand why they replay the ending monologue three times.
My preferred interpretation is that the writers found Graves' ending monologue so shoehorned-in, pompous, and heavy-handed that they decide to end the episode the way they ended the movie, by hammering in a message that over-dramatizes the story's moral. But... Some people like this movie. Maybe some people like that cheesefest of a soppy monologue? I don't get it.


205 - Rocket Attack USA - almost 3 years ago
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"All right, Captain, as long as you didn't get inside."
TOM: Well, I got to third, if that counts for anything.

Wow. As Mike might say, that's late night!


313 - Earth vs. the Spider - over 2 years ago
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I actually kind of like this movie.


402 - The Giant Gila Monster - almost 3 years ago
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Also, "Sid's Malt Closet."


402 - The Giant Gila Monster - almost 3 years ago
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I love that Joel is disappointed in the robots that he himself built and programmed. God must be like a giant, cosmic Joel, arguing with his robots. And the earth is...the SOL or something, I don't know. I didn't really think this metaphor through.


107 - Robot Monster - almost 3 years ago
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This movie out-Lynched David Lynch!


Recent Riffs

203 - Jungle Goddess - 7 months ago
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“You don't think I intended to carry that sentence out, do you? ”
I was counting on it!


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“It's no use. Nobody's got any sodium.”
“Did you try calling everyone in the telephone book?”
“Yeah, almost. All but a couple.”


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That Nazi fish guy has got a real moisture problem.


909 - Gorgo - about 2 years ago
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Um, we are a submarine, right? Yeah, good. (1:01:23)


306 - Time of the Apes - over 2 years ago
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"Are you ready to die?"
Frankly, no.


408 - Hercules Unchained - over 2 years ago
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Evinrude: the early years.


417 - Crash of the Moons - over 2 years ago
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You know, a fella could make a real funny comment about that if he was so inclined.


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Loosen up, it's a monster movie!


322 - Master Ninja I - over 2 years ago
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"Your home?"
"You're travelin' in it, Jack."
You're jackin' in it, Trav...em...


301 - Cave Dwellers - almost 3 years ago
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Tits all over—I mean, it's all over for you, Ator. I know we've been breast—best friends. Damn.

...Nipple.


301 - Cave Dwellers - almost 3 years ago
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"You must not lose heart."
Because a guy will eat it.


420 - The Human Duplicators - almost 3 years ago
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Just playing God. It's going pretty well!