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Hawthorne Rollings

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Favorite Episodes

  1. Attack of the Giant Leeches
    191
  2. The Killer Shrews
    224
  3. Attack of the the Eye Creatures
    206
  4. The Day the Earth Froze
    242
  5. The Magic Voyage of Sinbad
    195
  6. Eegah
    355
  7. Beginning of the End
    238
  8. San Francisco International
    238
  9. The Incredible Melting Man
    244
  10. Racket Girls
    156
  11. The Touch of Satan
    309
  12. Pod People
    512
  13. Catalina Caper
    246
  14. Village of the Giants
    177
  15. The Creeping Terror
    229
  16. The Human Duplicators
    185
  17. The Final Sacrifice
    681
  18. Zombie Nightmare
    278
  19. Swamp Diamonds
    141
  20. The Undead
    218
  21. Hercules and the Captive Women
    139
  22. Overdrawn at the Memory Bank
    386
  23. Riding with Death
    353
  24. War of the Colossal Beast
    205
  25. Girl in Gold Boots
    254
  26. Secret Agent Super Dragon
    193
  27. Samson Vs The Vampire Women
    255
  28. The Giant Spider Invasion
    313
  29. Hobgoblins
    360
  30. The Deadly Bees
    193
  31. Horrors of Spider Island
    205
  32. Alien from L.A.
    251
  33. It Lives by Night
    155
  34. The Deadly Mantis
    188
  35. The Projected Man
    185
  36. Danger! Death Ray
    425
  37. Operation Double 007
    208
  38. The Rebel Set
    144
  39. Hercules Against the Moon Men
    191
  40. Track of the Moon Beast
    252
  41. Invasion USA
    152
  42. Moon Zero Two
    176
  43. I Accuse My Parents
    366
  44. Werewolf
    484
  45. Ring of Terror
    174

Recent Comments with recent replies

701 - Night of the Blood Beast - over 1 year ago
5 laughs

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If it wasn't for the stupid phone in the short, those two idiots could of taken off for their " Honey Moon" ASAP without having to sing to inanimate objects, smoke a cartoon of ciggys, or bother gay angels with their tomfoolery. But alas, how hot would it of been? Judging by the sexy twin beds in the house, probably not so erotic.


1001 - Soultaker - over 4 years ago
4 laughs

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Why wasn't Joel killed when movie sign came up?


501 - Warrior of the Lost World - over 5 years ago
6 laughs

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A bit of trivia: Donald Pleasence, whom you may know as Blofeld in You Only Live Twice, was in THX1138, was Dr. Sam Loomis in the "Halloween" series,Dr. Seward in the 1979 Dracula movie, played B.D. Hoffer in Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band, was Dr. Michaels in Fantastic Voyage,Satan in "The Greatest Story EverTold", played multiple roles in both of The Great Escape movies, as well as being a RAF piolot in WWII (and subsequently a P.O.W)


907 - Hobgoblins - about 5 years ago
12 laughs

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There's something perversely admirable about a film that dares to not feature a single likeable character.

Lookit what we're handed here: Old Blithering Idiot lets his partner: Bland Teen Stereotype get horribly murdered by alien monsters. He then hires Annoying Whiny Douche to replace him. On his second day on the job, Annoying Whiny Douche manages to release said monsters who, despite having an entire city of victims to choose from, concentrate all of their effort on Annoying Whiny Douche's friends. There's his girlfriend: Frigid Emasculating Shrew, and his "pals": Scrawny Repugnant Whore and her boyfriend: Greasy Macho Scumbag....last and assuredly least is the 5th wheel: Effeminate Pervert Loser.
What a cast!
There is NO ONE and NOTHING to root for in this film save for the sweet release of death.


907 - Hobgoblins - over 4 years ago
13 laughs

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Mike's attempts to wrangle the bots during the opening credits reminds me of when I have to pack up my cats to go to the vet.


3 laughs

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So, a black dress (that's less revealing than her other dresses) and a sideways ponytail denotes the evilness in Jessica? That, and the "sassy" attitude and ability to drink one small shot of alcohol, of course. She MUST be a servant of demonic spirits!


609 - The Skydivers - over 3 years ago
7 laughs

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Real talk: Beth (Kevin Casey) is super adorable, despite (or perhaps because of) her impressive hair-helmet.


509 - The Girl in Lovers Lane - almost 3 years ago
1 laugh

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I know I wrote this a lot, but this is truly an underappreciated episode. In fact, this may be the most criminally underappreciated episode of them all. It has my favorite MST song ever, and so many pause-the-movie, laugh-out-loud quips that it takes me five hours to watch it through. This silly movie brought out the sneaky snark. Oh, just smiley it already!


Has this happened to you?
Forum - about 1 year ago
0 laughs

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So I was watching Giant Spider Invasion which I've seen like a million times and I got a riff that I never have before. Now I know that I've heard before but it's always gone in one ear and out the other. It's just strange of why I finally got it.


1011 - Horrors of Spider Island - almost 5 years ago
6 laughs

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"With my luck, I would've crashed with ZZ Top."


5 laughs

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Ah, one of the funniest episodes I think I've ever seen.


901 - The Projected Man - over 3 years ago
4 laughs

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Hey .. as a Brit I can't help but take just a little bit of offence at the guys stance on the accents in this movie .. I mean I know it all sounds 'funny' to you yanks .. but come on!! .. At least you can understand what they're saying. After all the crappy american b-movies they've say through you'd think they'd have found it refreshing! Other than that I thought this was a great episode .. just remember .. it takes a queen's english british man to make a REAL villain!! You won't be laughing when Christopher Lee comes to kick your ass ... with great articulation and dialogue that can kill all on it's own!


Recent Riffs

509 - The Girl in Lovers Lane - over 1 year ago
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"Christina's World" one of the most fruity ways a guy could look around while sitting on the floor!


516 - Alien from L.A. - almost 2 years ago
1 laugh

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Hey Madame a Curie!?! Can I get my fries over here?!?!


905 - The Deadly Bees - over 2 years ago
2 laughs

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(Bees buzzing and swarming, telephone ringing off the hook) Yeah this will calm her nerves....Hope they have enough Komodo dragons on the premises.


905 - The Deadly Bees - over 2 years ago
1 laugh

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When he slept out on the floor with someone new?


905 - The Deadly Bees - over 2 years ago
1 laugh

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( Machine gun noises when the camera's pointed at Vicky)


905 - The Deadly Bees - over 2 years ago
1 laugh

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Ahhhh! A bear!!


905 - The Deadly Bees - over 2 years ago
1 laugh

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" I'm so tired..." And hot for some reason. I just got back from the Antarctic......


905 - The Deadly Bees - over 2 years ago
2 laughs

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Just skip the music and go right for the heroin!


905 - The Deadly Bees - over 2 years ago
1 laugh

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" The Skinnys!!"


905 - The Deadly Bees - over 2 years ago
1 laugh

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"Stop the music!"
Not that's good advice.


905 - The Deadly Bees - over 2 years ago
2 laughs

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I don't care!


905 - The Deadly Bees - over 2 years ago
1 laugh

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Wow! Look at the arm on her!