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Jordan Carpenter

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The dialogue in this movie keeps clarifying its own vocabulary, which drives me nuts. "We hoped that you would be able to understand, or to learn how Col. Manning survived." "He's growing at an accelerated, or speeded-up rate."


901 - The Projected Man - over 2 years ago
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"No, I'm sorry. Your magic teleportation device has absolutely no practical utility or scientific merit until you can use it on guinea pigs."


204 - Catalina Caper - over 1 year ago
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Two or three more rehearsals, and Joel's rant about the 60s would be an all-time classic.


607 - Bloodlust - over 1 year ago
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Drunk guy, you're an idiot. "Now that four strange kids have shown up, and the evil sociopath murderer has strongly implied he's onto us, we can finally go through with our plan, which doesn't involve the four kids and all and we could have done at any time." I bet you're not even that good at chess.


Paste Magazine rates 'every' episode of MST3K
Forum - 9 months ago
4 laughs

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Okay, they skip the KTMA experiments, but here's their opinion on the other 177 shows: https://www.pastemagazine.com/articles/2017/03/ranking-every-mst3k-episode-from-worst-to-best.html

Feel free to disagree!


Best worst performance
Forum - 10 months ago
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MST3K films are not known for their excellent acting, but I've long been fascinated by the TRULY MEMORABLY BAD performances. So what's your favorite?

Just a note, I don't mean merely incompetent. I mean what results when a not-completely-untalented person commits to a bad performance with gusto. The best example I can think of is the bald evil wizard from Deathstalker and the Warriors from Hell. He's not totally bad (I legit like some things, like the way he underplays his first meeting with the hero), but most of his choices are just bizarre and fascinating.


614 - San Francisco International - almost 2 years ago
1 laugh

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What in the living hell does the candy counter even have to do with anything?? He punched the guy right there in broad daylight!


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You know, real talk: The actor who plays Kimar is able to wrest himself a decent amount of dignity, despite everything. Even surrounded by all the nonsense, I totally believe that he is a stalwart leader who wants best for the children of Mars. I mean it! The guy deserves credit.


811 - Parts: The Clonus Horror - over 2 years ago
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So, um, how come everyone's totally in support of his plan to go back to the murderous, evil organ farm?


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